My li'l sis, Deborah, just wrote a post on prodromal labor. Last April, she gave birth to her third baby via this labor pattern. I would love to link to or post the birth story when she makes it available (but I understand how it is--I still haven't published Ian's birth story from 19 months ago), but for now, this will have to suffice:
http://belladolcebirths.blogspot.com/2012/01/prodromal-labor-what-is-it.html
Deborah and I are of the same mind when it comes to discussing prodromal labor: that all-too-often, trying to fit what it is (or can be) into a chart or concise definition becomes too restrictive and not all that helpful. This is the biggest reason that, for all my wanting to educate about the fact that such a labor pattern does exist, this blog has yet to truly "define" it in terms that many birthy sites have--I find those definitions leave one thinking too much in-the-box, which we tend to do anyway when it comes to what is "normal" in birth. (Not to mention that my own experiences with this pattern often oppose what is detailed in the charts.)
Unfortunately, I have found that the people who are most close-minded in relation to the prodromal labor pattern are birth workers (be it doctors, nurses, midwives, doulas, or birth educators) and women who have given birth before. In fact, in some cases, women who have several (even many) children tend to be the most dismissive about the possibility of prodromal labor, sometimes considering a woman's own experience with it suspect (as in, what could be wrong with your perception to make you think this can happen?). It is as if whatever was their own experience is all that can possibly be out there.
The most open-minded people I've encountered on this subject are (not surprisingly) women who have experienced the pattern themselves and women who have never before given birth. I've even seen people go from open-minded about the possibility before birth to completely narrow-minded after experiencing a more textbook birth. (It is on the close-minded people that I sometimes wish prodromal labor, I admit.) When it does occur, it can be very vindicating. :)
Showing posts with label Braxton Hicks. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Braxton Hicks. Show all posts
Friday, February 3, 2012
Thursday, April 15, 2010
Want to Read Another Prodromal Experience from the Laboring Woman's Perspective?
Lynsie linked to this blog as she was (possibly is still?) in the middle of a prodromal pattern of labor a couple weeks ago. I like to divide prodromal labor into two categories--one that takes breaks (and can last weeks--perhaps 5-6 hours or a whole day/night, then not picking up like that again for another day or two), and the other that continues uninterrupted until baby is born (and lasts a couple days or more). It appears that what she experienced is the first pattern--and my favorite, personally!
In her post, she mentions that she's found it a comfort to read my experiences w/this type of labor, and that is exactly why I started this blog. There are too many women who come out of this pattern with no validation for what they've experienced, and from my perspective, it can create a very lonely--even crazy feeling. (More on feeling crazy later--have I got a story for you! I can hardly wait to tell it!)
So, if you are a woman who has stumbled upon this blog because you, too, are experiencing something that you cannot find in printed material or haven't had satisfactory answers from your provider, doula or childbirth educator (there are many who are either not aware it exists or have misconceptions about it), you may find comfort in hopping over to Lynsie's post, Diary of a Laboring Woman. She gives some good detail--helpful for those of us who search for things based on "sypmtoms." You may find her experience to be for you what mine was for her--comforting.
Go check it out. I do hope she posts about how it went!
In her post, she mentions that she's found it a comfort to read my experiences w/this type of labor, and that is exactly why I started this blog. There are too many women who come out of this pattern with no validation for what they've experienced, and from my perspective, it can create a very lonely--even crazy feeling. (More on feeling crazy later--have I got a story for you! I can hardly wait to tell it!)
So, if you are a woman who has stumbled upon this blog because you, too, are experiencing something that you cannot find in printed material or haven't had satisfactory answers from your provider, doula or childbirth educator (there are many who are either not aware it exists or have misconceptions about it), you may find comfort in hopping over to Lynsie's post, Diary of a Laboring Woman. She gives some good detail--helpful for those of us who search for things based on "sypmtoms." You may find her experience to be for you what mine was for her--comforting.
Go check it out. I do hope she posts about how it went!
Saturday, February 27, 2010
Contracting vs. Not Contracting: A Visual
This was my belly a little over a week ago, at 19.5 weeks, not contracting.
The shape of my belly changes as I have a contraction.
As pregnancy progresses, some contractions become so obvious that even outsiders can tell a difference. A couple years ago, when I was 35 weeks with Haley, I was at a scrap-booking event with a friend. As a contraction began (they were about 10 minutes apart and very strong that day), I sat back in my chair and rested a moment. A couple ladies across the way (about 10 feet away) looked at my belly and asked, "Are you having a contraction? . . . Because your belly looks really odd." It did. It was contorted and almost boxy--like my uterus had corners to it! I have no idea what was going on during that contraction, but I sure wished I'd brought my camera!
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
20 Weeks, Contracting Regularly
Before I get into last night's events, I want to disclose a few things: I am not a clock-watcher. The reason I know so well the timing of last night's episode has to do with the fact that I was near a clock all evening and could not help but notice that contractions were coming very close together (verifiable by glancing at said clock). I had only to set my eyes in a particular direction to see what time it was in each room I found myself (and for the bath, I could also note the length of contractions, since that clock also had a second hand).
I would/do not advocate that every woman time every contraction that ever happens, nor do I do this myself. However, my researchy side has found that sometimes this is the only way for people to acknowledge that these kind of things actually do happen--they are not just impressions. Actual times can be noted. Several things that I have experienced contraction-wise in pregnancy and labor are so far from textbook that I find the in-the-textbook-box thinkers quite annoying at times.
It can be very discouraging to go through a non-textbook experience and have it discounted or explained away by these people. I recall being in a room full of women a few months ago, listening to a woman who has probably witnessed a few hundred births (if not more) and should know better, defining prodromal labor as contractions that a woman experiences that are only a few seconds long, but "mom" has the impression that she is in labor, when a more objective viewer can clearly see that she is simply paying attention too soon (another way to say prodromal labor is not real). While I do not doubt that this scenario is possible, I did not appreciate that she failed to acknowledge the fact that women do indeed have long, strong and close-together contractons for days at a time that very much fit the description of true labor contractions. What was made clear in her description was that she herself had not ever labored this way, and had probably not seen much of it either.
I hope to expound on a few of my "researchy" ideas in this pregnancy, but I need to talk with my midwives first, so for now, here's what began at 5 p.m. yesterday despite being well-rested, eating and snacking, drinking 64 ounces of water, emptying my bladder often and soaking in a warm tub of water:
Monday marked the completion of my 20th week of pregnancy. My body celebrated by contracting every 2 minutes for seven-plus hours. And that quite unexplainably, as they started about an hour after my waking from a 2-hr nap, while I was preparing dinner (and snacking on avocado, cheese, carrot, ham, etc.) and drinking water. In the beginning, it made a little sense that I was experiencing contractions at that moment (empty stomach, a while since I'd hydrated myself, etc.), but they didn't change after having 2 (16 oz) glasses of water and plenty of dinner. So far in this pregnancy, two-minute-apart contractions are not something I have experienced yet (at least that I have noticed).
My usual pregnancy/labor contractions are not very "regular" in the truest sense. Generally, the only way I have "regular" contractions is by grouping them in a window (say, 3-5 minutes apart), but last night, they were right. on. the dot. As one would start, I'd look at the clock on the stove and, sure enough, 2 minutes had gone by. I would feel another one coming on and could be certain that if I looked up again, I would see another even number.
After eating dinner, cleaning up and putting the girls to bed, Case and I sat down for the next few hours and checked e-mail and read up on a few things. I had another couple (16 oz) glasses of water. Yet the contractions did not budge a bit.
By 11:30, Case had gone to bed. I was still contracting, and not in a going-to-bed mood, as they were still very close and I didn't think I could sleep until they either slowed or calmed down, intensity-wise (not that most of them were intense--once-in-a-while I would feel a distinct down-low "opening" feeling at the contraction's peak, but otherwise, they were just noticeable, with a discernable start, peak, and decline).
So, I drew a bath, had another glass of water and a snack, and had a very short let-up timing-wise: Two contractions were 5 min. apart (about 30 seconds long), but then the next one was 4 min. (30 seconds again), the next 3 (45 seconds), and after those 4 contractions, they settled back into 2 min apart again, 45-50 seconds long for the duration of the bath. Around 12:40, I decided that I had exhausted all the things I could think of to slow/stop contractions, and I lay down to try to get some sleep.
It was a little difficult to fall asleep, as I could feel my belly dig into the mattress (I was on my side) every couple minutes. Hard to get past the distraction of my body working while I wanted to sleep. However, it wasn't more than 20 minutes before I was able to drift off, and they did not wake me through the night. In the morning, I awoke to contractions 15 minutes apart, and that was a good discovery.
Today was very busy, and I didn't notice another pattern of close-together contractions, so that is encouraging. It is not that I worry about these episodes--this is how my body gears up for giving birth. This kind of thing is nothing new to my pregnancies, and I haven't yet had the fear that I'm in pre-term labor.
This is the irony of my body doing automatically what my mind would never choose to do: if it were up to my mind, I don't believe I would have even one contraction until birth day. I am a procrastinator and have never been very motivated to practice or even begin something until it is just about due, be it a writing assignment or a baby's birth!
So, it is not that I worry when this kind of thing happens. However, having too many spells like this can have a frustrating effect, so I am grateful that today was not a continuation of yesterday's weirdness. This pregnancy, I am purposing to have a better attitude, should that kind of thing happen. My tendency is to become annoyed, and I want to instead welcome whatever happens, and follow Philippians 2:14 better by not grumbling or disputing. I did this too much with my second pregnancy, and fell into complaining about seemingly needless contractions now and then with my 3rd as well. So, this time even more, I'd like to be really mindful of my mental/emotional state within the physical state of unexplainable contractions and remain postitive.
I would/do not advocate that every woman time every contraction that ever happens, nor do I do this myself. However, my researchy side has found that sometimes this is the only way for people to acknowledge that these kind of things actually do happen--they are not just impressions. Actual times can be noted. Several things that I have experienced contraction-wise in pregnancy and labor are so far from textbook that I find the in-the-textbook-box thinkers quite annoying at times.
It can be very discouraging to go through a non-textbook experience and have it discounted or explained away by these people. I recall being in a room full of women a few months ago, listening to a woman who has probably witnessed a few hundred births (if not more) and should know better, defining prodromal labor as contractions that a woman experiences that are only a few seconds long, but "mom" has the impression that she is in labor, when a more objective viewer can clearly see that she is simply paying attention too soon (another way to say prodromal labor is not real). While I do not doubt that this scenario is possible, I did not appreciate that she failed to acknowledge the fact that women do indeed have long, strong and close-together contractons for days at a time that very much fit the description of true labor contractions. What was made clear in her description was that she herself had not ever labored this way, and had probably not seen much of it either.
I hope to expound on a few of my "researchy" ideas in this pregnancy, but I need to talk with my midwives first, so for now, here's what began at 5 p.m. yesterday despite being well-rested, eating and snacking, drinking 64 ounces of water, emptying my bladder often and soaking in a warm tub of water:
Monday marked the completion of my 20th week of pregnancy. My body celebrated by contracting every 2 minutes for seven-plus hours. And that quite unexplainably, as they started about an hour after my waking from a 2-hr nap, while I was preparing dinner (and snacking on avocado, cheese, carrot, ham, etc.) and drinking water. In the beginning, it made a little sense that I was experiencing contractions at that moment (empty stomach, a while since I'd hydrated myself, etc.), but they didn't change after having 2 (16 oz) glasses of water and plenty of dinner. So far in this pregnancy, two-minute-apart contractions are not something I have experienced yet (at least that I have noticed).
My usual pregnancy/labor contractions are not very "regular" in the truest sense. Generally, the only way I have "regular" contractions is by grouping them in a window (say, 3-5 minutes apart), but last night, they were right. on. the dot. As one would start, I'd look at the clock on the stove and, sure enough, 2 minutes had gone by. I would feel another one coming on and could be certain that if I looked up again, I would see another even number.
After eating dinner, cleaning up and putting the girls to bed, Case and I sat down for the next few hours and checked e-mail and read up on a few things. I had another couple (16 oz) glasses of water. Yet the contractions did not budge a bit.
By 11:30, Case had gone to bed. I was still contracting, and not in a going-to-bed mood, as they were still very close and I didn't think I could sleep until they either slowed or calmed down, intensity-wise (not that most of them were intense--once-in-a-while I would feel a distinct down-low "opening" feeling at the contraction's peak, but otherwise, they were just noticeable, with a discernable start, peak, and decline).
So, I drew a bath, had another glass of water and a snack, and had a very short let-up timing-wise: Two contractions were 5 min. apart (about 30 seconds long), but then the next one was 4 min. (30 seconds again), the next 3 (45 seconds), and after those 4 contractions, they settled back into 2 min apart again, 45-50 seconds long for the duration of the bath. Around 12:40, I decided that I had exhausted all the things I could think of to slow/stop contractions, and I lay down to try to get some sleep.
It was a little difficult to fall asleep, as I could feel my belly dig into the mattress (I was on my side) every couple minutes. Hard to get past the distraction of my body working while I wanted to sleep. However, it wasn't more than 20 minutes before I was able to drift off, and they did not wake me through the night. In the morning, I awoke to contractions 15 minutes apart, and that was a good discovery.
Today was very busy, and I didn't notice another pattern of close-together contractions, so that is encouraging. It is not that I worry about these episodes--this is how my body gears up for giving birth. This kind of thing is nothing new to my pregnancies, and I haven't yet had the fear that I'm in pre-term labor.
This is the irony of my body doing automatically what my mind would never choose to do: if it were up to my mind, I don't believe I would have even one contraction until birth day. I am a procrastinator and have never been very motivated to practice or even begin something until it is just about due, be it a writing assignment or a baby's birth!
So, it is not that I worry when this kind of thing happens. However, having too many spells like this can have a frustrating effect, so I am grateful that today was not a continuation of yesterday's weirdness. This pregnancy, I am purposing to have a better attitude, should that kind of thing happen. My tendency is to become annoyed, and I want to instead welcome whatever happens, and follow Philippians 2:14 better by not grumbling or disputing. I did this too much with my second pregnancy, and fell into complaining about seemingly needless contractions now and then with my 3rd as well. So, this time even more, I'd like to be really mindful of my mental/emotional state within the physical state of unexplainable contractions and remain postitive.
Saturday, January 16, 2010
Contraction at 12 Weeks
Early on in my four pregnancies, I always intend to take pictures of my very small uterus showing itself as I lay on my back. I think I may have accomplished this with Ruby, my first pregnancy, but otherwise, the weeks come and go with me thinking first thing in the morning, "I wish I had the camera right now." I have a few things to thank for this fascinatingly obvious baby bump (it's all uterus) so early on: 1) It is morning, and my bladder is full and 2) I am having a contraction.I finally brought the camera by my bedside so I could take this pic in the morning, because it had been several weeks that my pregnancy was noticeable in this posture (as opposed to the other weeks--er--months that standing up, I have a belly, but it is most definitely mine).
Contractions started with this pregnancy toward the end of my sixth week. About the same time as they did last pregnancy. My latest-arriving Braxton-Hicks (B.H.) were with my second pregnancy, at about 14 weeks. They arrived before 12 weeks with my first, but I didn't take note of exactly when, because I didn't know it was "not supposed to happen." (Or, by many professionals, "DOESN'T happen." Ha! Where do they get this stuff?)
Differences with this pregnancy include that my B.H. have been ever-present, yes, but not incredibly bothersome. I can tell when I'm having one, but it doesn't usually hurt (annoying at times, yes). And I have only had a few truly "crampy" days, when the contractions felt menstrual-like and late-labor-ish. These days were clustered right around the time the contractions presented: at six and seven weeks. Another nice thing is that I have not spotted once in this pregnancy, and that is a first. Something for which I'm very grateful is the fact that my back does not constantly ache like it did even from the first weeks of my last pregnancy. I have a strong suspicion that the reason is that my abdominal muscles are stronger than they were in that pregnancy, since I had a few extra months "postpartum" to get back into shape (not that I did such a thing). It has been nice to not awaken to an already-aching back.
I am now almost 15 weeks into this journey. Not sure why, but my "first trimester" is extending into the second in the nausea/exhaustion department. Perhaps it is because my family and I have been battling sickness for over a month now (colds and whatnot). Maybe my body is trying to fight off/get better so much that it has no time to tend to other issues, like paying attention to what week it is :). The worst of it was the combination of nausea/gagging and profuse drainage (I know, TMI, but this whole post is pretty much TMI, so if you've gotten this far, are you actually surprised?). Drainage is no fun anyway, but I would not wish it on a first-trimester woman I didn't like.
Smells. . . in the first trimester, these can be very tricky to deal with. Not just bad ones, but overly "good" ones can be so sickening. My friend recently told me how she got sick of the smell of lavender after making a bunch of sachets as gifts during her first trimester. This pregnancy, the worst "good" smell has got to be our fabric softener. It makes me gag. I've noticed that I'll choose my or my children's clothing for the day based on the fact that it's not fresh out of the laundry, which is a challenge, since nowadays I do not have much in the way of clothing options, and almost all my options have been recently washed.
On to brighter things: despite how it looks in the above photo, I am still able to sleep on my stomach, and I am drinking up the nights where I still have every option open to me: Left side? yes. Right side? Well, okay. Back? Indeed. Stomach? Oh, yes, please! It has to be annoying for anyone who likes all their options--pregnancy is a sacrifice of comfort in many areas. I remember in my past postpartum recoveries, being more than happy to lie on my tummy to help the involution of my uterus (Here's a bonus tidbit: my home-birth midwives do not mash on my stomach after delivery. They take the far-gentler approach of assigning sessions of tummy-lying in the days after birth, for which I am grateful, because tummy-mashing hurts like the dickens.) My stomach-sleeping window is closing quickly. I will miss you, my comfortable friend, but look forward to when we will meet again in 6 months!
Okay, since I'm getting all my frivolous little complaints out there, I will also mention a question that has perplexed me for the last 3 pregnancies. No, not, "Why does my body have to gain weight there when I'm pregnant?" (Seriously, what do those parts have to do with carrying a baby?). The question of "Why, if I will not be giving birth for the next six months, does my pelvis have to get all loosey-goosey now?"
I would say it happened overnight, because that is how suddenly it came on, but it was even more suddenly. At 13 weeks, 2 days, I sat down to rest one afternoon and got up with that "splitting chicken" feeling, and it has been with me ever since. I do not have to describe this to most pregnant women, I'm sure, especially ones who have had more than one baby, but for those who have yet to experience this, picture for a moment that you have no legs, and someone has attached ropes to the bottom of your hip bones, and has given these ropes to opposing teams in a tug-of-war match.
That is the feeling to which I refer, and it limits one's ability to move about as lightly and gracefully as she once did (Mmm-hmm:). Small things become extremely painful. Have you ever used your foot/leg to scoot something that was a little too heavy to lift? That's out. Big steps? That's out. Letting your toddler sit on your foot and gallop away on her horsey? Definitely out. Walking like a normal person? That's out. (But try to anyway, so people won't laugh at you.)
I'm getting all my "pregnancy" stuff out in this post. Haley is still nursing, but quickly losing interest. I cannot say I am disappointed. Ruby's (understandably, my first) pregnancy is the only one in which I have not nursed for at least some time. (I have logged in about a year's worth of nursing-while-prego at this writing.)
Many people think you can't or shouldn't nurse while pregnant. It isn't so much that you can't as much as it isn't very appealing to the mom-to-be to have all this stuff going on inside her body and to also then subject her body to more "abuse" on the outside. But, since my children have all been relatively young when I have gotten prego again, I have not felt right about weaning them. So, they nurse until they are no longer interested. (And that has never been five years so far--thankfully!)
Haley is now almost 20 months, which is exciting to me, because I've never nursed a baby so long before! Ruby quit around 14 months and Claire was about 16-17 months. Ruby was my earliest to wean, but, because of her closeness to Claire, was the one who nursed the farthest into pregnancy--six months. I was glad when she decided she was done, because I was getting tired of being kicked from the outside and the inside at the same time. I was caught in the middle of already-developing sibling rivalry, and more than happy to be rid of the whole business. Claire nursed the shortest time into pregnancy, at about 2-3 months. That was also welcome, because the first trimester demands so much of a body anyway . . .
So, whenever Haley is ready to give it up, I will sigh with relief and a sweet sadness of that phase with her passing, but no real grief. Breastfeeding is a blessing, and I absolutely would not consider not doing it, but there are many things about it that I do not miss when it is over. I've mentioned before that I am not one of those who just loves breastfeeding (except the fact that God is so good to make such a wonderful system of nourishing a baby--I am thankful for His provision in this), and though I am committed to it as long as my babies are interested, I am NOT a big fan of breastfeeding, personally. It is great, and it is best, and I do . . . not. . . like it.
Casey and I are getting more and more used to the idea of having four little pairs of pitter-pattering feet, and I would have to say that even though I would not describe myself as "excited" in the truest sense, I am very happy and okay with the idea of welcoming another child, and plan toward it and think of it often.
I am excited about the birth of this baby, and that probably makes me a real weirdo among women, but I can truly say that. Birth is something wonderful and special and though it happens all the time all over the world, I will only do it a select amount of times, and I am so glad I get to do it again! I can't hardly wait to see how this labor and birth will go. Very exciting!
Saturday, June 13, 2009
Baby Born to Exhausted, but Happy Mama!
A while back, I asked a woman I'll call Elle if she would write out her birth story for my blog. I had been inspired by what little details I knew of her long and wonderful labor, and wanted to share another positive, hopeful prodromal birth story with my readers (i.e., prodromal birth is totally doable!).
I should mention that this woman and her husband had several things going for them, which contributed to her joyous completion of several days of labor with no pain meds and little intervention! Ladies, if she can do it (not a self-proclaimed "tough" person), you can, too! Elle and her hubby had taken thorough classes from an independent teacher (not a hospital--perhaps some day I will post on why this is important) that gave them many good tools for handling the labor she experienced. She had also chosen a midwife for her care, and I have to say, I was impressed that the medical staff encouraged her to go home several times, and that she was smart enough to do it!
Read on for a truly inspiring prodromal birth story! Oh, and of course, I LOVE how she starts it. Isn't that the truth about prodromal labor?!
___________________________________________________
“I’m not sure when I would say that I “went into labor.” I started having contractions on and off as early as 4 months pregnant. Sometimes I would have them for an hour or two coming as quickly as a couple minutes apart, but then they would stop. About two weeks before my due date, I decided to have my midwife check to see if I was dilated and I was 3cm dilated and 80% effaced and the baby’s head was at 0 station in my pelvis.
"Three days before I had the baby, I started having contractions again around 7PM. I was excited and hoping the contractions would stay this time, so I decided to march around the room to see if they would get stronger. The contractions started to get stronger and closer together, sometimes lasting a minute long and being about 3-4 mins apart. I knew I wanted to try to labor as long as I could at home before I went to the hospital, so I kept watching for the Emotional Sign Posts that we learned in Bradley Class. I still felt like I could pretty much talk through the contractions, so I knew I still had time. That night I woke up on and off with contractions.
"At one point I couldn’t sleep, more out of excitement that my contractions were lasting all night, and I decided to march around the living room some more. Our cats came down and sat on the stairs and watched me like I was crazy. The next day we decided to call my midwife to let her know I was still having contractions every 3-4 min and they were lasting about a minute each. Even though I didn’t feel like it was time yet, they asked me to come in to just be checked and see where I was at. I was about 4 cm dilated now. The midwife told me to go home and get in the bath tub to help me relax and let my body work. I was hungry though and we decided to stop at a local pizza place across the street from her office.
"We started out at a booth inside, but I was so hot from all the contractions I had to go outside in the winter air and cool off. So we ended up being the only people out on the patio. My husband said the people inside were watching and sort of smiling but concerned at the same time as he had to keep getting up and rubbing my back through the contractions. I got about half my slice down and then I just knew I had to get home so I could really relax. My husband ran inside and grabbed a box for the pizza and we took off.
"We ended up going to my mom’s house, which was a little closer to the hospital. The bath felt so good that I ended up staying in it for about 4 hours while my husband and mom took turns rubbing my back through each contraction. My contractions were just as strong and close together as earlier, but the water seemed to lighten the pressure from my back labor a bit. It also helped me rest and conserve some energy for later. Around 5 p.m., my family thought I should check in to the hospital. I didn’t really feel like it was time yet, but I agreed to go since I couldn’t talk during contractions anymore and I figured it must be soon.
"We stopped at a health food store for some popsicles and honey sticks. I had about two more contractions as I hurried through the store to get what I wanted. Then we met my dad who was just getting off work at a burger place to get some food for everyone. I was the one who wanted to go get food, but I ended up regretting the choice and just wanted to leave. We made it to the hospital around 6 p.m. and the midwife on call checked me and I was still only about 4-5 cm dilated and my contractions seemed to slow down a little while I was there. Both sides of the family had come to the hospital and now I was feeling bad like I needed to do something for them. We tried to walk around and see if they would pick up again, but they were only about 6 mins apart now.
"The midwife knew I wanted to try going natural so she said the best thing for me would be to go home and try to get some sleep so I would have energy in the morning to have the baby. So we ended up back at my mom’s house to spend the night. I’m not sure I got any sleep that night as my contractions started to get really strong and close together.
"At 4 a.m., I got back in the tub and my husband would “wake up” every 4 minutes and rub my back or feet. I’m not sure he really was awake: he started to fall into the tub once as he was rubbing my back! I stayed in the tub most of the morning so I could try to rest between the contractions to make up for the missed sleep the night before.
"About 10 a.m., we went outside in front of my mom’s house and walked around a bit. My contractions were getting very strong so we decided to call our midwife again. They were booked at the office, but were able to squeeze me in with one of the OBGYNs to see where I was at before we drove all the way downtown. I was now a good 5, maybe 6 cm and the OBGYN said he thought I would probably have the baby that night or early the next morning. He told me to go get something to eat and go check in the hospital whenever I felt ready.
"We decided to go back to my mom’s house one more time. I have low blood sugar, so I knew I wanted to get as much protein and energy in before I went to the hospital, where they have you stay on a liquid diet during labor. I went to lie down and read a Psalm as I tried to stay relaxed while my husband, mom and sister all ran around the kitchen trying to find foods that would be good for me. I could hear the excitement in their voices and sort of resented the fact that they were excited. I’m pretty hospital-phobic and by now I was starting to feel like it was too much for my body, I just felt like crying. But I was encouraged and reminded that God was going to give me strength.
"By the time they brought me food (around 4 p.m.) I knew it was time to go. I was in the serious stage sign post and I really wasn’t in the mood to eat, although I did force myself to eat a little since I knew I would have a blood sugar crash from not eating dinner. My mom drove us so that my husband could stay in the back and help me through contractions.
"We arrived at the hospital around 5 p.m. We checked into Triage where they got my IV ready for the antibiotic to kill the GBS [Group B Strep] that I had (which my husband and I now sort of regret accepting). The first IV the young nurse accidentally “Blew up my vein” she told me—a needle/blood-phobic person. My husband sort of whispered to her and told her not to talk out loud about it and tried to get her to fix it without letting me hear details so that I wouldn’t panic. Another girl came in to take a blood sample and then the young nurse came back and tried the IV again. My mom thought it looked funny and it felt weird to me, but the nurse assured us that it was right.
"She took us to our birthing room where I saw the most beautiful tub I’ve ever seen! I wanted to get in there right away, but the nurses wanted to get a dose of antibiotic in first. My mom and husband saw the little bed with the baby hat and blanket in it and were almost in tears with excitement that our baby would soon be here! I was excited too, but at that moment I just couldn’t look at it. I couldn’t think about anything else besides relaxing through the contractions.
"Well, it ended up that the IV wasn’t even in a vein and after almost getting a full bag of antibiotic fluids, we realized it was just going into my arm. My arm swelled to double its size and I realized I was trying to take deep relaxing breaths not for the contractions but because my arm was killing me. They brought in a good nurse who took out the bad IV. My veins were really constricted now so it took her two tries before she got a good one in. I was so thankful once the IV was in and it didn’t hurt anymore! I think the whole IV fiasco slowed me down a little, but they let me get into the wonderful tub and I stayed in there for quite awhile. I think I would have stayed there forever if they would have let me, but they encouraged me to try to get out for a little bit and move around to see if things would go faster.
"I loved the nurse and midwife I had that night! They just sat there with us in silence and let us relax. The midwife would rub my back or head to help me relax. Every once in a while she would give me suggestions for different laboring positions. I don’t really remember time periods anymore, but I know about 10 p.m., the midwife came in and checked me and I was about 7 cm dilated. She could tell I was getting really tired. She asked us if we would want her to break my bag of waters. At first I didn’t like that idea at all and wanted to experience it breaking on its own, but my husband and I talked and prayed and decided it would be good. So at around 10:30 p.m., they broke my water.
"Right away, I went into transition. I felt like I was on some kind of weird ride. It felt good to have the warm water empty out with each contraction, but it was also strange to feel so out of control of my body. I remember holding on to the bar of the bed and almost feeling like I was on some kind of swaying ship. I threw up once, but then felt fine in my stomach.
"Probably about an hour later I had an urge to push. I told the midwife and she checked me and said I was about 7-8 cm. She told me to make some grunting noises as if I was pushing to keep me from really pushing. It felt like only seconds later that I was telling them that my body was pushing and I didn’t know how to stop it.
"The midwife, who was about to leave, ran back to me and checked and said I was almost at 10cm. She told me I could start pushing with the contractions gently. Pushing felt so wonderful! My husband later told me he was sympathy pushing with me. :o) The midwife used her hand to help the cervix gently come over the baby’s head so that it didn’t tear. It felt a lot better once her head was past that point.
"The midwife asked me if I thought I could get up and sit on the toilet for awhile to push. I stayed there for about 3-4 contractions. We tried some squatting too, but after a little bit I was too tired and they had me sit up in the bed. They gave me some oxygen between pushes for extra energy. They also brought in the mirror for me so I could see my baby as she was crowning.
"I reached down and felt her head and saw the first little glimpses of her! They asked my husband if he would like to catch our baby. He looked a little unsure, but decided to do it. They told him to go wash up and get gloves on and right as he left the bed to do that I felt another pushing contraction and was a little worried he was going to miss it! But I still had a few to go.
"During the pushes I couldn’t seem to talk or look at anything. I felt this amazing rush of all my energy go into each push. At one point I tried to look as I pushed, but everything went black. I wasn’t scared though. It just felt so powerful and amazing! Birth really is such a miracle! After about an hour of pushing and 54 total hours of labor, our little girl was born at 1:05 AM January 16th, 2009. They placed her on my stomach and I looked down at her and she opened her eyes and looked up at me. It was love at first sight!"
I should mention that this woman and her husband had several things going for them, which contributed to her joyous completion of several days of labor with no pain meds and little intervention! Ladies, if she can do it (not a self-proclaimed "tough" person), you can, too! Elle and her hubby had taken thorough classes from an independent teacher (not a hospital--perhaps some day I will post on why this is important) that gave them many good tools for handling the labor she experienced. She had also chosen a midwife for her care, and I have to say, I was impressed that the medical staff encouraged her to go home several times, and that she was smart enough to do it!
Read on for a truly inspiring prodromal birth story! Oh, and of course, I LOVE how she starts it. Isn't that the truth about prodromal labor?!
___________________________________________________
“I’m not sure when I would say that I “went into labor.” I started having contractions on and off as early as 4 months pregnant. Sometimes I would have them for an hour or two coming as quickly as a couple minutes apart, but then they would stop. About two weeks before my due date, I decided to have my midwife check to see if I was dilated and I was 3cm dilated and 80% effaced and the baby’s head was at 0 station in my pelvis.
"Three days before I had the baby, I started having contractions again around 7PM. I was excited and hoping the contractions would stay this time, so I decided to march around the room to see if they would get stronger. The contractions started to get stronger and closer together, sometimes lasting a minute long and being about 3-4 mins apart. I knew I wanted to try to labor as long as I could at home before I went to the hospital, so I kept watching for the Emotional Sign Posts that we learned in Bradley Class. I still felt like I could pretty much talk through the contractions, so I knew I still had time. That night I woke up on and off with contractions.
"At one point I couldn’t sleep, more out of excitement that my contractions were lasting all night, and I decided to march around the living room some more. Our cats came down and sat on the stairs and watched me like I was crazy. The next day we decided to call my midwife to let her know I was still having contractions every 3-4 min and they were lasting about a minute each. Even though I didn’t feel like it was time yet, they asked me to come in to just be checked and see where I was at. I was about 4 cm dilated now. The midwife told me to go home and get in the bath tub to help me relax and let my body work. I was hungry though and we decided to stop at a local pizza place across the street from her office.
"We started out at a booth inside, but I was so hot from all the contractions I had to go outside in the winter air and cool off. So we ended up being the only people out on the patio. My husband said the people inside were watching and sort of smiling but concerned at the same time as he had to keep getting up and rubbing my back through the contractions. I got about half my slice down and then I just knew I had to get home so I could really relax. My husband ran inside and grabbed a box for the pizza and we took off.
"We ended up going to my mom’s house, which was a little closer to the hospital. The bath felt so good that I ended up staying in it for about 4 hours while my husband and mom took turns rubbing my back through each contraction. My contractions were just as strong and close together as earlier, but the water seemed to lighten the pressure from my back labor a bit. It also helped me rest and conserve some energy for later. Around 5 p.m., my family thought I should check in to the hospital. I didn’t really feel like it was time yet, but I agreed to go since I couldn’t talk during contractions anymore and I figured it must be soon.
"We stopped at a health food store for some popsicles and honey sticks. I had about two more contractions as I hurried through the store to get what I wanted. Then we met my dad who was just getting off work at a burger place to get some food for everyone. I was the one who wanted to go get food, but I ended up regretting the choice and just wanted to leave. We made it to the hospital around 6 p.m. and the midwife on call checked me and I was still only about 4-5 cm dilated and my contractions seemed to slow down a little while I was there. Both sides of the family had come to the hospital and now I was feeling bad like I needed to do something for them. We tried to walk around and see if they would pick up again, but they were only about 6 mins apart now.
"The midwife knew I wanted to try going natural so she said the best thing for me would be to go home and try to get some sleep so I would have energy in the morning to have the baby. So we ended up back at my mom’s house to spend the night. I’m not sure I got any sleep that night as my contractions started to get really strong and close together.
"At 4 a.m., I got back in the tub and my husband would “wake up” every 4 minutes and rub my back or feet. I’m not sure he really was awake: he started to fall into the tub once as he was rubbing my back! I stayed in the tub most of the morning so I could try to rest between the contractions to make up for the missed sleep the night before.
"About 10 a.m., we went outside in front of my mom’s house and walked around a bit. My contractions were getting very strong so we decided to call our midwife again. They were booked at the office, but were able to squeeze me in with one of the OBGYNs to see where I was at before we drove all the way downtown. I was now a good 5, maybe 6 cm and the OBGYN said he thought I would probably have the baby that night or early the next morning. He told me to go get something to eat and go check in the hospital whenever I felt ready.
"We decided to go back to my mom’s house one more time. I have low blood sugar, so I knew I wanted to get as much protein and energy in before I went to the hospital, where they have you stay on a liquid diet during labor. I went to lie down and read a Psalm as I tried to stay relaxed while my husband, mom and sister all ran around the kitchen trying to find foods that would be good for me. I could hear the excitement in their voices and sort of resented the fact that they were excited. I’m pretty hospital-phobic and by now I was starting to feel like it was too much for my body, I just felt like crying. But I was encouraged and reminded that God was going to give me strength.
"By the time they brought me food (around 4 p.m.) I knew it was time to go. I was in the serious stage sign post and I really wasn’t in the mood to eat, although I did force myself to eat a little since I knew I would have a blood sugar crash from not eating dinner. My mom drove us so that my husband could stay in the back and help me through contractions.
"We arrived at the hospital around 5 p.m. We checked into Triage where they got my IV ready for the antibiotic to kill the GBS [Group B Strep] that I had (which my husband and I now sort of regret accepting). The first IV the young nurse accidentally “Blew up my vein” she told me—a needle/blood-phobic person. My husband sort of whispered to her and told her not to talk out loud about it and tried to get her to fix it without letting me hear details so that I wouldn’t panic. Another girl came in to take a blood sample and then the young nurse came back and tried the IV again. My mom thought it looked funny and it felt weird to me, but the nurse assured us that it was right.
"She took us to our birthing room where I saw the most beautiful tub I’ve ever seen! I wanted to get in there right away, but the nurses wanted to get a dose of antibiotic in first. My mom and husband saw the little bed with the baby hat and blanket in it and were almost in tears with excitement that our baby would soon be here! I was excited too, but at that moment I just couldn’t look at it. I couldn’t think about anything else besides relaxing through the contractions.
"Well, it ended up that the IV wasn’t even in a vein and after almost getting a full bag of antibiotic fluids, we realized it was just going into my arm. My arm swelled to double its size and I realized I was trying to take deep relaxing breaths not for the contractions but because my arm was killing me. They brought in a good nurse who took out the bad IV. My veins were really constricted now so it took her two tries before she got a good one in. I was so thankful once the IV was in and it didn’t hurt anymore! I think the whole IV fiasco slowed me down a little, but they let me get into the wonderful tub and I stayed in there for quite awhile. I think I would have stayed there forever if they would have let me, but they encouraged me to try to get out for a little bit and move around to see if things would go faster.
"I loved the nurse and midwife I had that night! They just sat there with us in silence and let us relax. The midwife would rub my back or head to help me relax. Every once in a while she would give me suggestions for different laboring positions. I don’t really remember time periods anymore, but I know about 10 p.m., the midwife came in and checked me and I was about 7 cm dilated. She could tell I was getting really tired. She asked us if we would want her to break my bag of waters. At first I didn’t like that idea at all and wanted to experience it breaking on its own, but my husband and I talked and prayed and decided it would be good. So at around 10:30 p.m., they broke my water.
"Right away, I went into transition. I felt like I was on some kind of weird ride. It felt good to have the warm water empty out with each contraction, but it was also strange to feel so out of control of my body. I remember holding on to the bar of the bed and almost feeling like I was on some kind of swaying ship. I threw up once, but then felt fine in my stomach.
"Probably about an hour later I had an urge to push. I told the midwife and she checked me and said I was about 7-8 cm. She told me to make some grunting noises as if I was pushing to keep me from really pushing. It felt like only seconds later that I was telling them that my body was pushing and I didn’t know how to stop it.
"The midwife, who was about to leave, ran back to me and checked and said I was almost at 10cm. She told me I could start pushing with the contractions gently. Pushing felt so wonderful! My husband later told me he was sympathy pushing with me. :o) The midwife used her hand to help the cervix gently come over the baby’s head so that it didn’t tear. It felt a lot better once her head was past that point.
"The midwife asked me if I thought I could get up and sit on the toilet for awhile to push. I stayed there for about 3-4 contractions. We tried some squatting too, but after a little bit I was too tired and they had me sit up in the bed. They gave me some oxygen between pushes for extra energy. They also brought in the mirror for me so I could see my baby as she was crowning.
"I reached down and felt her head and saw the first little glimpses of her! They asked my husband if he would like to catch our baby. He looked a little unsure, but decided to do it. They told him to go wash up and get gloves on and right as he left the bed to do that I felt another pushing contraction and was a little worried he was going to miss it! But I still had a few to go.
"During the pushes I couldn’t seem to talk or look at anything. I felt this amazing rush of all my energy go into each push. At one point I tried to look as I pushed, but everything went black. I wasn’t scared though. It just felt so powerful and amazing! Birth really is such a miracle! After about an hour of pushing and 54 total hours of labor, our little girl was born at 1:05 AM January 16th, 2009. They placed her on my stomach and I looked down at her and she opened her eyes and looked up at me. It was love at first sight!"
Saturday, November 22, 2008
Haley's Birth Story, Part 1
In September of 2007, Casey and I found out we were expecting our third baby. Braxton Hicks presented crampy and strong at six weeks of pregnancy (the earliest so far) and instead of being afraid or annoyed, I embraced them as one of my best preparations for childbirth. After Claire’s easy-breezy birth, due partially to the fact that it felt like I had been in labor for a month (the other part having to do with a very challenging first birth experience which I was prepared to repeat), I decided to rejoice in how God made me and the things my body seems to deem necessary to get a baby born. I equate my body to an old car on a frosty morning: it takes several attempts to start—as well as some revving in those attempts—before a continued and lasting, no-going-back start is achieved.
From the last two births, I had had a mental list going on what I would like to do the same or differently. One of those "same" things was have a home birth. There is just no comparison to the atmosphere one encounters in a hospital versus home. So after some finagling, our wonderful midwife agreed to take us on as clients once again. She had planned to take the year off and do some traveling, but decided to take on a few clients within a specific window, and we were due in that time! She went to Africa for about 6 weeks during my second trimester. All went well with the pregnancy, and we did the usual and declined most of the tests, etc. throughout. Barb was very supportive. How the girls and I enjoyed those hour-plus appointments!
Casey and I are practical; we enjoy finding out the gender of our babies before birth day. Not having yet been with a home-birth midwife for an entire pregnancy, I asked Barb if she ever ordered ultrasounds and she said not unless there was a medical reason. (How funny that insurance companies won’t pay for ultrasounds except for a “medical” reason, yet I don’t know one woman birthing in a hospital nowadays—including me—who has not been offered at least 2 ultrasounds in her pregnancy.) I guess Barb is much more conservative than the average doctor or hospital midwife in what qualifies as a medical reason (i.e. not to “check dates” or “size” or whatever other reasons my ultrasounds have been for), and I respect her for it. But it was a little bummer that we’d have to wait to see what this baby was. We just don’t get the whole “What better surprise is there?” thing. It’s a surprise no matter what, right? So what if you find out early? It’s still a surprise at the time. And there’s still the surprise of “when,” unless you are inducing or scheduling a c-section, but I digress.
A few of the things on my list that I wanted to try differently included Casey A) being present for more than a few hours of labor and, therefore, B) helping me through contractions when I needed him. We discussed and practiced several ways he could help me through contractions and things he could do in labor in general to assure me of his presence and support.
My “different” list also included some trivial things to try, like a relaxing and calm atmosphere for labor (complete with music and a pretty labor nighty—not a tank top or Casey’s big, ugly t-shirt) and naps and a bath—I wanted to take advantage of the “midwives’ epidural” this time. You'd think my labors were only an hour long the way we haven't taken advantage of some common labor techniques in the first two births. The problem is, prodromal labor can have the same effect as a really short labor in that it lulls one into thinking, "this baby isn't coming anytime soon," until it's too late to do anything but have a baby.
It was also important to me to focus on the beauty of the gift of birth and what a miracle God does in bringing a baby into the world. I wanted to make the day of labor worshipful by being mindful of His handiwork in making this baby and my body, and His sovereignty over what may happen in childbirth. This is crucial to relaxation for me—to trust God. I simply cannot just trust “birth” or my body. Those things can (and often do) fail. God is always the same. And He is always trustworthy.
Throughout the pregnancy, I practiced relaxation with my Braxton Hicks. One difference with these B.H. this time around was that they were very crampy, and thus, even more like “real” contractions than ever before (I have a hard time distinguishing “real” ones as it is). I did not keep track of my contractions this time like I did in Claire’s pregnancy. That served a purpose, and I no longer needed to figure out why I couldn’t discern “real” labor. There were a few times when I thought—based on the strength, duration and frequency of contractions—that I might be going into labor, but this time I didn’t pay enough mind to them to really wonder. Most of the really strong, long and close together bouts lasted a few hours or less this time, so I didn’t have much time to start wondering before they tapered off again, and the few times that they were like that for an entire day, I took them in stride and figured (based on my previous birth experiences) that I’d most likely discover “this is it” before the baby was born. I wouldn't miss the birth of my baby.
For Part 2, click here
From the last two births, I had had a mental list going on what I would like to do the same or differently. One of those "same" things was have a home birth. There is just no comparison to the atmosphere one encounters in a hospital versus home. So after some finagling, our wonderful midwife agreed to take us on as clients once again. She had planned to take the year off and do some traveling, but decided to take on a few clients within a specific window, and we were due in that time! She went to Africa for about 6 weeks during my second trimester. All went well with the pregnancy, and we did the usual and declined most of the tests, etc. throughout. Barb was very supportive. How the girls and I enjoyed those hour-plus appointments!
Casey and I are practical; we enjoy finding out the gender of our babies before birth day. Not having yet been with a home-birth midwife for an entire pregnancy, I asked Barb if she ever ordered ultrasounds and she said not unless there was a medical reason. (How funny that insurance companies won’t pay for ultrasounds except for a “medical” reason, yet I don’t know one woman birthing in a hospital nowadays—including me—who has not been offered at least 2 ultrasounds in her pregnancy.) I guess Barb is much more conservative than the average doctor or hospital midwife in what qualifies as a medical reason (i.e. not to “check dates” or “size” or whatever other reasons my ultrasounds have been for), and I respect her for it. But it was a little bummer that we’d have to wait to see what this baby was. We just don’t get the whole “What better surprise is there?” thing. It’s a surprise no matter what, right? So what if you find out early? It’s still a surprise at the time. And there’s still the surprise of “when,” unless you are inducing or scheduling a c-section, but I digress.
A few of the things on my list that I wanted to try differently included Casey A) being present for more than a few hours of labor and, therefore, B) helping me through contractions when I needed him. We discussed and practiced several ways he could help me through contractions and things he could do in labor in general to assure me of his presence and support.
My “different” list also included some trivial things to try, like a relaxing and calm atmosphere for labor (complete with music and a pretty labor nighty—not a tank top or Casey’s big, ugly t-shirt) and naps and a bath—I wanted to take advantage of the “midwives’ epidural” this time. You'd think my labors were only an hour long the way we haven't taken advantage of some common labor techniques in the first two births. The problem is, prodromal labor can have the same effect as a really short labor in that it lulls one into thinking, "this baby isn't coming anytime soon," until it's too late to do anything but have a baby.
It was also important to me to focus on the beauty of the gift of birth and what a miracle God does in bringing a baby into the world. I wanted to make the day of labor worshipful by being mindful of His handiwork in making this baby and my body, and His sovereignty over what may happen in childbirth. This is crucial to relaxation for me—to trust God. I simply cannot just trust “birth” or my body. Those things can (and often do) fail. God is always the same. And He is always trustworthy.
Throughout the pregnancy, I practiced relaxation with my Braxton Hicks. One difference with these B.H. this time around was that they were very crampy, and thus, even more like “real” contractions than ever before (I have a hard time distinguishing “real” ones as it is). I did not keep track of my contractions this time like I did in Claire’s pregnancy. That served a purpose, and I no longer needed to figure out why I couldn’t discern “real” labor. There were a few times when I thought—based on the strength, duration and frequency of contractions—that I might be going into labor, but this time I didn’t pay enough mind to them to really wonder. Most of the really strong, long and close together bouts lasted a few hours or less this time, so I didn’t have much time to start wondering before they tapered off again, and the few times that they were like that for an entire day, I took them in stride and figured (based on my previous birth experiences) that I’d most likely discover “this is it” before the baby was born. I wouldn't miss the birth of my baby.
For Part 2, click here
Thursday, May 22, 2008
Could This Be It?
At 4:30 this morning, I awakened to a strong contraction and went to empty my bladder. A few minutes later, another one came, just as strong (sometimes my full bladder can make them feel more intense, so I expected a trip to the toilet to take care of the discomfort). Then a few minutes later, another intense one came. These required my attention and concentration to breathe, stay relaxed and not tense up. I woke Casey to tell him I had just had 3 very strong contractions in the last 15-20 min. and got up to get a snack, as I felt pretty nauseated. I decided to time contractions while eating.
So far, they’ve been 8-13 minutes apart and really intense. I’m glad it’s morning, because I’ll be able to call Barb soon without worrying about waking her for no good reason. Casey will probably stay home a few hours at least until we know what’s going on and if this is labor, and if it is progressing fast enough to warrant not going into work at all. I just remembered I need to take some herbs for my GBS (yes, no surprise, I’m positive yet again). Will update in a few hours if it is not labor, and if so, the next post may be a birth announcement!
For now, it’s herbs and back to sleep. Pray for me!
So far, they’ve been 8-13 minutes apart and really intense. I’m glad it’s morning, because I’ll be able to call Barb soon without worrying about waking her for no good reason. Casey will probably stay home a few hours at least until we know what’s going on and if this is labor, and if it is progressing fast enough to warrant not going into work at all. I just remembered I need to take some herbs for my GBS (yes, no surprise, I’m positive yet again). Will update in a few hours if it is not labor, and if so, the next post may be a birth announcement!
For now, it’s herbs and back to sleep. Pray for me!
Tuesday, May 13, 2008
Contractions, Contractions
I just called a friend from church to cancel our plans for meeting today. The girls and I were going to spend a few hours at her house, which is at least an hour away. Last night, I was awakened many times by contractions, which, in my experience with my previous labors, usually means that the contractions are "real," but the same thing happened Saturday night, and they petered out to nothing special by mid-church on Sunday. I am virtually certain I will not be having a baby today, but the possibility (however remote) that I will be so far away from home (or anywhere--she lives way out in the country) when I realize "this is it" is way too much of a chance to take. I just picture myself giving birth alone in the car (with the girls in their car seats) on the side of the road and with no cell phone service, and it's enough to make the difficult decision to cancel.
Since 6:15 this morning, I've been trying to figure out what's going on, because if I'm not going to give birth today, it would be really good to keep my mind off the contractions by going somewhere or at least having an activity planned. I haven't officially timed contractions (the girls played with our "contraction-timing" watch the other day, and I have yet to find it again), but they've been about 3-5 minutes apart (by the clock) and fairly strong. I packed Casey's lunch, ate breakfast with the girls, took them on a walk around the neighborhood, watered the lawn & plants, and showered. I didn't notice a change in the contractions, but they were not debilitating. I don't know what I hoped to find out, because there isn't much difference between my Braxton Hicks contractions and real labor contractions. Needless to say, I ended up calling Case to see what he thought I should do. He feels the same way: almost sure I won't have the baby in the next day or two, but not worth the chance of giving birth on the side of the road or the kitchen floor of our friend's house.
So, here I sit at home. The girls and I are going to take an early nap in a few minutes and then see how things go after lunch. Maybe we'll try to stop by a friend's house here in town if I'm getting distracted by the contractions this afternoon. I'm not paranoid about going out--just trying to be careful about how far I go.
Since 6:15 this morning, I've been trying to figure out what's going on, because if I'm not going to give birth today, it would be really good to keep my mind off the contractions by going somewhere or at least having an activity planned. I haven't officially timed contractions (the girls played with our "contraction-timing" watch the other day, and I have yet to find it again), but they've been about 3-5 minutes apart (by the clock) and fairly strong. I packed Casey's lunch, ate breakfast with the girls, took them on a walk around the neighborhood, watered the lawn & plants, and showered. I didn't notice a change in the contractions, but they were not debilitating. I don't know what I hoped to find out, because there isn't much difference between my Braxton Hicks contractions and real labor contractions. Needless to say, I ended up calling Case to see what he thought I should do. He feels the same way: almost sure I won't have the baby in the next day or two, but not worth the chance of giving birth on the side of the road or the kitchen floor of our friend's house.
So, here I sit at home. The girls and I are going to take an early nap in a few minutes and then see how things go after lunch. Maybe we'll try to stop by a friend's house here in town if I'm getting distracted by the contractions this afternoon. I'm not paranoid about going out--just trying to be careful about how far I go.
Saturday, May 10, 2008
38 Weeks
38 Weeks and counting. . . ! Casey’s supposed to take some belly pics this weekend. I took some with my little camera yesterday in case the other ones don’t happen (we’ve been meaning to do belly pics every few weeks, and hope we actually remember this time), but I’m not sure how good they are. Everything looks fine on the back of a tiny camera, but I am infamous for out-of-focus photos. Casey’s nice camera takes great pictures, but only if Casey’s taking them! It’s one of those that you really have to know what you’re doing to get a good result. The whole reason Casey got me my own little point-and-shoot camera is because I was almost always taking horrible pics (and getting really frustrated) with his nice one. The quality on his camera is so much better (a poster-size print is a piece of cake for this camera—looks great) that I always prefer that he take the really “momentous” pics. I hope the batteries cooperate with us when we have the baby. They have not been keeping a charge very long lately (yet when I put them on the charger, they show up fully charged).
Anyway, today was a really productive day. Case has every other Friday off (he works 8 9-hr days and one 8-hr day, which makes up for a whole day off—love that schedule!), and we got a lot done today. This may be as close to nesting as I’ve really ever been—I don’t know why nesting isn’t something I do, but with each baby, I keep waiting (and looking forward to) an extra burst of energy and motivation to scrub, polish, organize—whatever you’re supposed to do in the days/weeks before giving birth—only to have the last days come and go with nary an inkling of bleaching the shelves in the fridge or taking a toothbrush to the tile grout on the backsplash. In some ways I consider it a blessing, because “nesting” can get a woman into serious trouble once labor is in earnest. Many women tire themselves out with this burst of energy: sometimes taking the precious hours of early labor to completely wear themselves out with “preparations” that are hardly necessary (and often damaging) to a natural, no-frills birth experience.
So my laziness has its perks, I guess. It isn’t that I never think about doing these things, but my body cannot keep up with my mind’s desire to accomplish the “things that really should be taken care of before baby comes,” and for sanity’s sake, I have to push some thoughts to the backburner and just focus on conserving energy and expending it frugally. Even if we accomplish all we have planned for this weekend, there are still at least ½ dozen other things I can come up with off the top of my head that should be dealt with before Cowart 3.0 arrives. Yet life will go on if those things don’t get done today (or perhaps this summer, or maybe ever).
That being said, our day was both productive and relaxing. We really enjoyed it. Mostly odds and ends having to do with preparing for company (my sister and her husband and new baby will be visiting next week and then my MIL is coming a few days later to help w/our new baby). Putting together the guest room, hanging a shower curtain, cleaning and organizing the office (I was truly dreading this—it was almost wall-to-wall with boxes, furniture, toys, paperwork, etc.), oh, and HANGING PICTURES. This is to be written in the history books. We have been living in our home for a little over 2 months and ALREADY have pictures hanging on our walls! This is something of a record (for me). I believe our last house saw 2 YEARS of naked wall-ness before I finally decided to hang 8 pictures one day. I just don’t have an artsy or creative bone in my body, and get paralyzed by perfectionism. Plus, I get used to things quickly. Bare walls don’t scream at me after awhile. When there are pictures, I notice them, though, and it felt great today to see something pretty on the wall.
I think most of “our” productivity today is due mostly to Casey’s motivation and continuing work, and not to any “nesting” that I may be feeling. Were it not for his energy to continue, I would have thrown the towel in after washing the dishes and doing a load of laundry (I was ready for a nap by 9:30 this morning). The differences we noticed in the little things we did were so amazing, it was almost easy to continue with more projects, and makes me excited about tomorrow’s projects (probably consisting of putting the crib together, building a foundation for the girls’ playhouse, then treating the wood on the playhouse, planting the tomato plants we bought today, taking some belly pics, complete change-out of winter/summer clothes for Casey (this is WAY overdue. . . it has been overly warm here for more than a month) and just generally organizing and cleaning things that have fallen by the wayside.
At any rate, and for whatever reason, I feel much more ready to have this baby now. I’ve had all the home birth supplies for a few weeks, but as of Tuesday, they are all in one place and easily accessible to us and the midwives. Today, our home feels more put-together and “homey,” which will no doubt help with mental relaxation in labor. And my body has been feeling crowded and twinge-y and waddle-y, along with some really good, strong contractions. Another week or 2 of this, and I will be more than happy to complete this season of pregnancy—even in the next few days I would feel prepared, but another week or 2 would be more than enough preparation to endure even many hours of hard work. I love how God made pregnancy that way. Just long enough to prepare for it and be glad for when it’s over. The discomforts of the last few months (and especially the last few weeks) make labor more feasible, I think.
Anyway, today was a really productive day. Case has every other Friday off (he works 8 9-hr days and one 8-hr day, which makes up for a whole day off—love that schedule!), and we got a lot done today. This may be as close to nesting as I’ve really ever been—I don’t know why nesting isn’t something I do, but with each baby, I keep waiting (and looking forward to) an extra burst of energy and motivation to scrub, polish, organize—whatever you’re supposed to do in the days/weeks before giving birth—only to have the last days come and go with nary an inkling of bleaching the shelves in the fridge or taking a toothbrush to the tile grout on the backsplash. In some ways I consider it a blessing, because “nesting” can get a woman into serious trouble once labor is in earnest. Many women tire themselves out with this burst of energy: sometimes taking the precious hours of early labor to completely wear themselves out with “preparations” that are hardly necessary (and often damaging) to a natural, no-frills birth experience.
So my laziness has its perks, I guess. It isn’t that I never think about doing these things, but my body cannot keep up with my mind’s desire to accomplish the “things that really should be taken care of before baby comes,” and for sanity’s sake, I have to push some thoughts to the backburner and just focus on conserving energy and expending it frugally. Even if we accomplish all we have planned for this weekend, there are still at least ½ dozen other things I can come up with off the top of my head that should be dealt with before Cowart 3.0 arrives. Yet life will go on if those things don’t get done today (or perhaps this summer, or maybe ever).
That being said, our day was both productive and relaxing. We really enjoyed it. Mostly odds and ends having to do with preparing for company (my sister and her husband and new baby will be visiting next week and then my MIL is coming a few days later to help w/our new baby). Putting together the guest room, hanging a shower curtain, cleaning and organizing the office (I was truly dreading this—it was almost wall-to-wall with boxes, furniture, toys, paperwork, etc.), oh, and HANGING PICTURES. This is to be written in the history books. We have been living in our home for a little over 2 months and ALREADY have pictures hanging on our walls! This is something of a record (for me). I believe our last house saw 2 YEARS of naked wall-ness before I finally decided to hang 8 pictures one day. I just don’t have an artsy or creative bone in my body, and get paralyzed by perfectionism. Plus, I get used to things quickly. Bare walls don’t scream at me after awhile. When there are pictures, I notice them, though, and it felt great today to see something pretty on the wall.
I think most of “our” productivity today is due mostly to Casey’s motivation and continuing work, and not to any “nesting” that I may be feeling. Were it not for his energy to continue, I would have thrown the towel in after washing the dishes and doing a load of laundry (I was ready for a nap by 9:30 this morning). The differences we noticed in the little things we did were so amazing, it was almost easy to continue with more projects, and makes me excited about tomorrow’s projects (probably consisting of putting the crib together, building a foundation for the girls’ playhouse, then treating the wood on the playhouse, planting the tomato plants we bought today, taking some belly pics, complete change-out of winter/summer clothes for Casey (this is WAY overdue. . . it has been overly warm here for more than a month) and just generally organizing and cleaning things that have fallen by the wayside.
At any rate, and for whatever reason, I feel much more ready to have this baby now. I’ve had all the home birth supplies for a few weeks, but as of Tuesday, they are all in one place and easily accessible to us and the midwives. Today, our home feels more put-together and “homey,” which will no doubt help with mental relaxation in labor. And my body has been feeling crowded and twinge-y and waddle-y, along with some really good, strong contractions. Another week or 2 of this, and I will be more than happy to complete this season of pregnancy—even in the next few days I would feel prepared, but another week or 2 would be more than enough preparation to endure even many hours of hard work. I love how God made pregnancy that way. Just long enough to prepare for it and be glad for when it’s over. The discomforts of the last few months (and especially the last few weeks) make labor more feasible, I think.
Sunday, May 4, 2008
How Is Someone Like Me Supposed to Know When to Call?
On Monday’s visit, I asked Barb when I should call her to come, and she said when I had activity-halting contractions ten minutes apart lasting 30 seconds. I have not been keeping track like I did with Claire’s pregnancy, but I have definitely been having strong and close together contractions for many weeks. One Sunday evening (at 29 weeks, 2 days), they were 3 minutes apart, then spacing to 5, then 10-15 over a 2-3 hour time period. The 3-min-apart ones only lasted about 45 minutes before they started to space out, but they were pretty strong, and the strength of my contractions has only intensified recently. Two days ago (when I finally started feeling better from my cold) they became noticeably more downward- and forward-pulling, and my back is involved now (not my lower back like in back labor, but a little higher, like it may be the round ligaments straining.)
Anyway, I’m pretty sure I’ve been having contractions that fit the description she gave for awhile now, but at least they haven't made much of a pattern yet. If I have close together contractions, they haven’t all been very strong. (Until Friday night, when they were only 2-5 minutes apart and very intense—even in the bath—I actually wondered if it was labor for a few hours. Here we go again.) Usually in the last few weeks with this pregnancy, I’ll have some moderate contractions throughout the day with a few an hour grabbing my undivided attention. And this pregnancy has been a little different in that my contractions don’t generally last more than a minute. As I said before, I’m not keeping track, but when I notice them when I’m near a clock, the minutes on the clock almost never change more than once before the contraction subsides (meaning contractions are at most less than 2 minutes long, and likely one minute or less). So that’s been a nice break this pregnancy. Even the doozies are pretty short, so I’m not going crazy yet.
The whole “how to tell if it’s the real deal” thing is very confusing to someone who labors like me. The general instruction a provider gives is to call when contractions are strong, 5 minutes apart, lasting 1 minute for an hour. So if I had followed those instructions for my last 2 births, I would have gone to the hospital (for absolute sure) 2 days before my first child was born (and possibly earlier than that, if I’d known to time them sooner), and my midwife would have been coming over to check me every few days for almost a month before my 2nd child was born. I’m not sure if I would have called by now in this pregnancy, since I’m not sure if they’re lasting a whole minute or not yet, but I’m already pretty close to meeting those standards now, and probably won’t have this baby for at least 2 weeks.
I could go by what my sister’s Doc told her when they called to see when to come in (water breaking, bloody show, or contractions 5 minutes apart or less). But let’s see . . . water breaking would mean we would have never made it to the hospital with Ruby (if it weren’t for amniotomy 13 minutes before her birth, the water may have never broken), and with Claire, our help barely made it in time (there is NO way we would have made it if we had to go to the hospital with her). So that’s not entirely reliable. How about bloody show? Well, we would have gone to the hospital over 49 hours before Ruby was born. A tad early, I think (and begging to be meddled with). And for Claire, she was almost out before any kind of blood was a factor. What about contractions 5 minutes apart? Like I said above, we would have been WAY too early for both births if we had gone by that sign.
It does scare me a little when I think that we may not know in time to call Barb and that I may have an unassisted birth this time. I do not want that, but it is a real possibility with how I labor. It’s either that or cry wolf 10 times and have Barb just roll her eyes when I actually do need her. Barb tells me that in her experience, second babies are usually the fastest, and it doesn’t mean that subsequent babies come faster and faster. But my problem is not so much with speed (Claire’s labor was 12 hours—not “fast” by almost anyone’s standards), but with how far I am into it before I know for sure that my baby is definitely coming this time. Add the fact that we’re farther away now that we’ve moved, and there is a great possibility that we’ll have this baby on our own.
I am not entirely fearful of this, but I am not in la-la land, either. I know childbirth is natural and that God made my body to do what it will do, but I’m not unaware of the tainting that “the fall” has had on all the things that, when God created them, he called “good.” The fact is that my body is not to be trusted: it is God who is to be trusted. And I need to be wise and discerning about my choices. I may not blindly bumble my way into serious consequences and blame it on Him. There is a delicate balance (I hate to use that word: it isn’t ideal) between trusting God and being foolish. I need to do all that I can to be careful and thoughtful, yet all the while trust that the outcome is truly in God’s hand. Casey and I will be praying for discernment to know in time that I am truly in labor.
Anyway, I’m pretty sure I’ve been having contractions that fit the description she gave for awhile now, but at least they haven't made much of a pattern yet. If I have close together contractions, they haven’t all been very strong. (Until Friday night, when they were only 2-5 minutes apart and very intense—even in the bath—I actually wondered if it was labor for a few hours. Here we go again.) Usually in the last few weeks with this pregnancy, I’ll have some moderate contractions throughout the day with a few an hour grabbing my undivided attention. And this pregnancy has been a little different in that my contractions don’t generally last more than a minute. As I said before, I’m not keeping track, but when I notice them when I’m near a clock, the minutes on the clock almost never change more than once before the contraction subsides (meaning contractions are at most less than 2 minutes long, and likely one minute or less). So that’s been a nice break this pregnancy. Even the doozies are pretty short, so I’m not going crazy yet.
The whole “how to tell if it’s the real deal” thing is very confusing to someone who labors like me. The general instruction a provider gives is to call when contractions are strong, 5 minutes apart, lasting 1 minute for an hour. So if I had followed those instructions for my last 2 births, I would have gone to the hospital (for absolute sure) 2 days before my first child was born (and possibly earlier than that, if I’d known to time them sooner), and my midwife would have been coming over to check me every few days for almost a month before my 2nd child was born. I’m not sure if I would have called by now in this pregnancy, since I’m not sure if they’re lasting a whole minute or not yet, but I’m already pretty close to meeting those standards now, and probably won’t have this baby for at least 2 weeks.
I could go by what my sister’s Doc told her when they called to see when to come in (water breaking, bloody show, or contractions 5 minutes apart or less). But let’s see . . . water breaking would mean we would have never made it to the hospital with Ruby (if it weren’t for amniotomy 13 minutes before her birth, the water may have never broken), and with Claire, our help barely made it in time (there is NO way we would have made it if we had to go to the hospital with her). So that’s not entirely reliable. How about bloody show? Well, we would have gone to the hospital over 49 hours before Ruby was born. A tad early, I think (and begging to be meddled with). And for Claire, she was almost out before any kind of blood was a factor. What about contractions 5 minutes apart? Like I said above, we would have been WAY too early for both births if we had gone by that sign.
It does scare me a little when I think that we may not know in time to call Barb and that I may have an unassisted birth this time. I do not want that, but it is a real possibility with how I labor. It’s either that or cry wolf 10 times and have Barb just roll her eyes when I actually do need her. Barb tells me that in her experience, second babies are usually the fastest, and it doesn’t mean that subsequent babies come faster and faster. But my problem is not so much with speed (Claire’s labor was 12 hours—not “fast” by almost anyone’s standards), but with how far I am into it before I know for sure that my baby is definitely coming this time. Add the fact that we’re farther away now that we’ve moved, and there is a great possibility that we’ll have this baby on our own.
I am not entirely fearful of this, but I am not in la-la land, either. I know childbirth is natural and that God made my body to do what it will do, but I’m not unaware of the tainting that “the fall” has had on all the things that, when God created them, he called “good.” The fact is that my body is not to be trusted: it is God who is to be trusted. And I need to be wise and discerning about my choices. I may not blindly bumble my way into serious consequences and blame it on Him. There is a delicate balance (I hate to use that word: it isn’t ideal) between trusting God and being foolish. I need to do all that I can to be careful and thoughtful, yet all the while trust that the outcome is truly in God’s hand. Casey and I will be praying for discernment to know in time that I am truly in labor.
Sunday, April 6, 2008
Nesting?
Having company over sometimes is my only safeguard against absolute, out-of-control chaos in my home. As difficult as it can be at times to get my home in shape for company, I am always glad for the forced blitz cleaning/decluttering.
Today, my house magically became more and more box-free, thanks to a friend who has a great balance of keeping me company while helping me accomplish things. Whenever she helps me, I can look around and see a huge difference in my home, yet I am not exhausted. I love that. It was getting a little discouraging sinking deeper and deeper into chaos in my home, being away at least 2 days out of the week (doing laundry and cleaning our other house in ABQ) and having Casey gone for a week. Our washer and dryer were delivered on Thursday, and I can't believe what a difference it has made to be able to once again do laundry while working on other house stuff.
We are finally entering the homestretch with our ABQ house. The plan is to finish up cleaning and whatever projects are left tomorrow after church. After the carpets are cleaned and the bug man sprays, our tenants are free to start moving in, probably next weekend. Yay! We're so close!
(Here's how our cleaning expedition went. Lots of help from the girls and we got alot done.)
And I also am walking daily w/the girls as of a few weeks ago. Nothing aerobic, but I am exercising ON PURPOSE again. Now I just need to step-it-up on the protein and I'll be doing better about the upcoming labor. Thankfully, my body is getting me VERY ready in the contraction/relaxation department. Lots of strong ones coming on now at 33 weeks. I'm trying to figure out what I should plan for labor day, though. The fact is that I really don't feel confident that I'll do well during the really hard work if I have observers besides the very few people who need to be there. Ruby talks alot about the baby coming and wanting to "hold it on my shoulder," even though it will be "slippy" and "have bwood." She is so into this birth thing, and I really think it could be great to have her there. I have no doubt that I can do pre- and early-labor with the two of them close by, as many of my contractions are already strong enough to warrant cessation of activity (or at the very least, "going easy") for at least 1/2 a minute or more, and I'm dealing with them anywhere from 20 minutes apart to 3 min. apart, all the while caring for my children and home. However, I can see that it would be good to have a back-up plan at least for Claire, and maybe even Ruby, should they cause more distraction than is okay during my really hard work. More for Casey's and the midwive's sake than mine. I don't want them having to go off and deal with the girls instead of attending to what needs to be done. I'm pretty sure I'll be able to focus like I did last time no matter what naughtiness might go on, but I don't want to put my helpers in that situation. Something will have to be done.
I'm quite excited about this upcoming labor, and really feel the pressure of only a few weeks left to prepare. This baby will be here in about 7 weeks! Wow! I need to get going!
Today, my house magically became more and more box-free, thanks to a friend who has a great balance of keeping me company while helping me accomplish things. Whenever she helps me, I can look around and see a huge difference in my home, yet I am not exhausted. I love that. It was getting a little discouraging sinking deeper and deeper into chaos in my home, being away at least 2 days out of the week (doing laundry and cleaning our other house in ABQ) and having Casey gone for a week. Our washer and dryer were delivered on Thursday, and I can't believe what a difference it has made to be able to once again do laundry while working on other house stuff.
We are finally entering the homestretch with our ABQ house. The plan is to finish up cleaning and whatever projects are left tomorrow after church. After the carpets are cleaned and the bug man sprays, our tenants are free to start moving in, probably next weekend. Yay! We're so close!
(Here's how our cleaning expedition went. Lots of help from the girls and we got alot done.)And I also am walking daily w/the girls as of a few weeks ago. Nothing aerobic, but I am exercising ON PURPOSE again. Now I just need to step-it-up on the protein and I'll be doing better about the upcoming labor. Thankfully, my body is getting me VERY ready in the contraction/relaxation department. Lots of strong ones coming on now at 33 weeks. I'm trying to figure out what I should plan for labor day, though. The fact is that I really don't feel confident that I'll do well during the really hard work if I have observers besides the very few people who need to be there. Ruby talks alot about the baby coming and wanting to "hold it on my shoulder," even though it will be "slippy" and "have bwood." She is so into this birth thing, and I really think it could be great to have her there. I have no doubt that I can do pre- and early-labor with the two of them close by, as many of my contractions are already strong enough to warrant cessation of activity (or at the very least, "going easy") for at least 1/2 a minute or more, and I'm dealing with them anywhere from 20 minutes apart to 3 min. apart, all the while caring for my children and home. However, I can see that it would be good to have a back-up plan at least for Claire, and maybe even Ruby, should they cause more distraction than is okay during my really hard work. More for Casey's and the midwive's sake than mine. I don't want them having to go off and deal with the girls instead of attending to what needs to be done. I'm pretty sure I'll be able to focus like I did last time no matter what naughtiness might go on, but I don't want to put my helpers in that situation. Something will have to be done.
I'm quite excited about this upcoming labor, and really feel the pressure of only a few weeks left to prepare. This baby will be here in about 7 weeks! Wow! I need to get going!
Tuesday, January 1, 2008
Finally! Claire's Pre-Birth Story (otherwise known as My Braxton Hicks School of Relaxation!)
What are “normal” Braxton Hicks (B.H) contractions? At what point in pregnancy are they supposed to be noticeable, what do they feel like, how long are they, and how many is one supposed to experience? These are some of the questions I would really like to have answered. Most of the women I’ve talked to either don’t know if they’ve experienced them or have had “a couple, the day before I went into labor” (perhaps because most of my friends/acquaintances have only had one or two babies so far and they aren't supposed to be "usual" until subsequent pregnancies). What I have read is not very helpful, either. Textbooks, I have come to believe, are far too constricting on the definition of a “normal” experience, and therefore have not been able to answer many of my questions. Surely, I am not the only one to experience what I do, but it seems as though nothing I’ve read or heard resembles what I experience. Please read on and let me know if any of this sounds similar to your experience or someone you know! (Is it truly that it’s not very common, or is it that the textbook definitions are just way off?)
When I started noticing Braxton Hicks contractions in my second pregnancy, (Claire—noticeable at 14 weeks, Jan. 2006) I realized my B. H. contractions must be very different from “normal,” because they feel like beginning/mid-labor contractions in their duration and intensity, as well as their frequency (especially during the last trimester). {Bonus note: At this writing, I am pregnant with my 3rd child and started noticing B.H. at 6 weeks that I could validate when I pushed on my rock-hard racquetball-sized uterus. By 9 weeks I had already experienced them every 10 minutes for several hours at a time; strong enough to keep me awake at night. Most days, at 18 weeks along now, at least 2 dozen contractions a day catch my attention, about 1/4 of which I would consider strong (i.e. I wait at least till after the peak of the contraction before comencing my activity).}
During my Braxton Hicks contractions, my entire uterus would get hard as a rock, feeling like it was about to burst, with an intense downward and forward pull and (especially toward the later weeks with Ruby & Claire, but already happening at 12 weeks w/the 3rd) much pelvic pain/pressure. Many of them were intense enough to have a nauseating effect, causing the back of my mouth to produce extra saliva and make me close to vomiting, which went along well with feeling "fluish" in the intestinal area. Pushing on my uterus during these contractions is painful, as it feels like it is bruised from overuse. Even having my belly touched is not preferable during most of my B.H. If sitting, I usually had to lean back (to give my belly room to move forward without any interference from my legs) as well as move or hold out my waistband on my pants to keep it from “digging in” during the contraction. In the last trimester, after experiencing frequent contractions for hours at a time, I often had to close my eyes, breathe deeply and relax all the muscles in my body in order to not worsen my discomfort and be driven crazy by these “go-nowhere” contractions. It was especially important to make a point of breathing abdominally to lessen the pain, because my initial reaction was to chest-breathe in order to keep the tummy part of me from expanding even more than it felt like it already was.
After months of long, strong, close together contractions (in the last few weeks for an average of 5-6 hours at a time, and sometimes all day and into the night), true labor was difficult to discern. I thought it would be easier to know for sure with my second child, since I now know what labor feels like and how bad it gets, but it was actually more confusing than when I was pregnant with Ruby (my first). With her, I didn’t know that my B. H. were unusually strong because I hadn’t ever had a baby before, so I didn’t know enough to wonder if labor was starting because I was having frequent and strong contractions. (I just thought that’s how B. H. were, and that I must be a wimp to be so annoyed by them.) Something should have clued me in that my contractions were not usual when my childbirth teacher described Braxton Hicks this way: “They don’t hurt, and they’re only like, 10 seconds long.” So only after I had been through labor and was again experiencing B.H. did it finally dawn on me why Ruby’s labor had been so confusing to me.
I decided to count some of my contractions and keep record of their timing in my pregnancy w/Claire. One reason was because I wondered why it was so easy for women to say “My labor started ________.” Why couldn’t I put a time on the start of my labor with Ruby? Was I crazy? And when I would tell people a little about my labor with Ruby, and that I didn’t know for sure if I was in labor until I was dilated to a six, I’d get some pretty weird looks; some assumed my labor must’ve been very mild for me not to know “this is it.”
Now, I have heard stories of women who didn’t know they were in labor because they didn’t feel anything until crowning, etc., but this does not even remotely resemble my experience! The reason that I did not recognize labor was due to the fact that I feel too much going on—and it is hard to discern whatever differences there may be between labor and prelabor for me—not because I wasn’t feeling pain or discomfort: I had been feeling labor-like contractions for months. This is why the description “Frog-In-The-Pot-Of-Water” is perfect for my labor experiences so far (and hence, why the blog has its name).
For the first few hours of my labor w/Ruby (my first), I wondered to myself, “Why am I timing Braxton Hicks just because I’ve had a bloody show?” My labor with her followed a shorter—but much more intense—prodromal pattern than Claire’s; putzing along from Sunday morning to evening, kicking into high gear all night long, then petering out to pretty normal (for me) B.H. on Monday, intensifying again the next night and continuing very hard until I had her Tuesday morning. But I wasn’t “allowed” to have started labor on Sunday—“women are in labor for hours, not days,” the triage nurse told me—so my chart reports that 1st stage was only 8 hours, 20 minutes. How nice.
So I kept a decent record with Claire’s pregnancy for several reasons: to make sense to myself why I was always wondering “will this turn out to be labor?” when it wouldn’t; to keep me from second guessing my memory when given the questioning looks (“But are they real contractions? How can you not know if you’re in labor? How lucky for it to be that easy for you! Mine was so hard/painful. I’d love to be able to say I didn’t know.”); to challenge people, like the triage nurse—who don’t believe me because my experience doesn’t fit into their box of what is possible in labor—that some women do not have a textbook experience, but the fact that you have never read, heard of or seen it doesn’t negate its validity, and finally to encourage other women who have or will experience something similar that they are not insane or wimps, and that they, too, can make the experience work for them, not against them. (As if the contractions don’t drive you crazy enough—you don’t need doubts that you’re imagining it all to top it off!)
{Just to make sure that we’re on the same page re: contractions, I’ll define what I mean. Duration/length: the time from start to finish of a contraction. Frequency/spacing: the time from the start of one contraction to the start of another (i.e. if a contraction started at 5 p.m. and was 1 min, 30 seconds in duration and at 5:05 p.m. I had another one, the time that I felt no contractions was 3 min, 30 seconds, yet I would say that the contractions are 5 min. apart). This is the standard way of timing contractions, but some women count the spacing from the end of one contraction to the beginning of the next as the frequency. This can make quite a difference when charting frequency if the contractions are of sizable duration, so it is important to define what I have in my mind when using the terms frequency/spacing and the like.}
In my pregnancies so far, my Braxton Hicks build in duration and intensity over the last trimester, becoming extremely strong and uncomfortable the last month. They never get totally regular—one month before Claire’s due date they were 5 to 18 minutes apart and everywhere in between (averaging 10 min. apart) but as regular as they can get (2 to 10 minutes apart—w/an average of 6 min.), they can really throw me off. Contrary to what many books say, a woman can be in active labor and not have a “regular” pattern. Even on Claire’s birthday (“real” labor!), my contractions were from 2 to 11 or more minutes apart within the same few hours.
Contractions also have a pretty long duration in the last few weeks of my pregnancies: I didn’t usually count any that didn’t last more then 30 seconds, and most of the time dismissed any that lasted less than a minute (so when, at 36 weeks, I wrote on my calendar on June 22 that I had counted more than 65 contractions in just short of 18 hours, or, almost 4 an hour—not that it was ever that neat—that’s not counting any short ones). Toward the last 3 weeks before Claire was born, I timed many that were in excess of 2 minutes long, and on several occasions, longer: a 6+ and 9+ minute contraction (around 8:45 p.m. and 2:30 a.m., respectively, July 3); one on my list lasted 3 min. 30 seconds and double peaked (10:07 a.m., July 5); I had 4 contractions on my chart July 9 that were between 3 min and 3 min, 15 sec. long, and a 5+ min. contraction (2:20 a.m.); I had a 4 min, 30 sec. contraction (10:15 p.m., July 10); and on the 13th—day before Claire was born—a 7 min, 40 sec. double peaking one at 7:41 a.m. (Too much detail, you say? But I did go to the trouble of keeping a careful record. I had to make it worth my while and put it in here somewhere!)
For the last month of my pregnancy w/Claire, I mostly counted my contractions on days when they seemed to be more frequent or regular. When they were also accompanied by pain associated w/labor and/or prelabor symptoms, I would also time them. The first day I did this was June 25th (36 weeks prego). I had extreme and constant pain in my lower back, as well as round ligament pain shooting into my legs, both of which did not let up between contractions (the pain, not my legs!). I was in agony, but the contractions themselves were uncomfortably strong and annoying, not what I would consider very painful. Nevertheless, I was in such pain overall, I thought this could be the day. (How many women start their labors with extremely painful contractions anyway? In most labors, it takes time to get to the “Wow, these are too painful!” stage, right?)
I started timing them in late morning, after seeing off my out-of-town company. I timed 47 contractions from 11:16 a.m. to 11:25 p.m., (averaging out to about 4 an hour, but I didn’t count or time all day—took a nap, took a break from timing for a few hours, etc.). Contractions came every 5 to 18 minutes (though most fell into a 5-12 minute window), were strong in intensity, and were anywhere from 30 seconds to 2 minutes, 10 seconds long. (When I timed—not counted—them, I did include the shorter ones in order to chart the frequency. But the average duration of contractions that day was 1 min, 15 seconds, which is funny, since some textbook “real” labors don’t ever get contractions longer than that, and if they do, that duration is not an average for the whole labor, but maybe an exception—say, during transition.) But, no baby came of all that contracting. I just quit timing and went to bed.
One other thing I noticed about my B.H. contractions that seem different from what I’ve read and what other women describe is that mine don’t seem to care much what I’m doing (including the textbook solution to lots of B.H.—drink water and empty your bladder often). Some of my friends have said that theirs will subside if they drink some water or change their activity level. I charted myself eating, drinking, bathing, walking, resting, etc. and they didn’t stop or even change much. Sometimes things like taking a bath or shower would even make them closer together—usually a sign that it is “real” labor. Another way they’re not like the textbook definition is that they are more—not less—noticeable during exercise; again, a sign of real labor.
Something that did help me through the last month (because I hide when I’m in pain if I don’t know someone extremely well) was spending time with people. Casey encouraged me to do this to keep my mind off the contractions and preserve my sanity. I met friends for lunch, took my Gram to her Dr. appointments, had company for dinner, etc. It was refreshing to think of something else besides, “Why is this happening . . . and why is it not happening at the same time?!” I was able to keep my mind otherwise engaged, all the while noticing most of the contractions I was having. They were strong enough to not be able to ignore, but I was agreeably occupied enough not to be frustrated by their presence.
Before switching to a home-birth midwife with Claire (another story for another time), I mentioned to my OB early on in the pregnancy that I had strong, frequent B.H. He said to tell him if they ever got to 4 an hour or more, because there would be a concern of pre-term labor. I just smiled. Later, I decided that I wouldn’t tell him, because this is exactly what happened w/Ruby, too, and I went full-term w/her (3 days early). I figured it would just cause unnecessary stress to me and the baby for them to do tests or “watch” me, or put me on drugs. I wonder how often that happens that something is falsely labeled as preterm labor, when time would show that it is just a cantankerous uterus? (It is probably too much of a risk—good thing I didn’t know better with Ruby. :) On April 24, 2006—when I was 28 weeks along—about the time I switched to a home birth midwife—I had 25+ contractions in about 2 hours (an average of less than 5 minutes apart). And yet they petered out and there was no delivery of a pre-term baby.
Perhaps I should take comfort in the fact that my B.H. contractions oftentimes fit the textbook description of active labor contractions. I suppose it should encourage me that it’s not all in my head. But if it’s not “labor” and it’s not “not” labor, then what is it?
On several occasions during the lovely month of “non-labor” with Claire, I would get back on the internet, type in “false labor” again and read what different medical/pregnancy/baby websites would say about it (had I missed something crucial?). It was so frustrating to run down the list of “if it’s really labor . . . ,” and say, “yes, they are strong, yes, they are regular (again, as regular as mine get—even in “real” labor), yes, they are close together, no, they don’t stop or change with differing behavior, yes, they are building in intensity” (though that is a subjective question—never knew quite how to answer that one—maybe I was just getting annoyed with them after so many hours.) “Yes, yes, yes.” Until I got to the cervical dilation part, which I didn’t know because I hadn’t been checked (and didn’t want to be checked: why bother with something that is either going to give me false hope that I’m going to have this baby any minute or disappoint me that I’m going through all this pain for nothing? So what if I am 70% effaced, dilated to a 4 and baby’s at zero station? I could go like that for weeks, as women have before me. And what if I’m an absolute zero and the baby hasn’t dropped? I could have the baby tomorrow, as women have before me. Numbers don’t necessarily mean labor is or is not happening!) And the last on the “real labor” list that would seal the deal: “It ends in a baby being born.” So I’d get off the computer, dejectedly figuring that the only way I’d know if it really was labor is when I actually had Claire and, in retrospect, could say, “So it was labor that time!” And what do you know? It happened almost exactly as I predicted (although I did realize it was the real thing almost 2 hours before she was born, so I got to have the excitement phase at least!).
On one of my last visits to my midwife before Claire was born, I told Barb I didn’t know at what point I should call her. She told me to call when contractions were 5 min. apart, lasting one minute for an hour. I said that I would have already called at least 5 times by now by that standard. She said, “Oh, you’re one of THOSE.” It was so different and very reassuring that she recognized that it was possible to experience what was happening to me. And she didn’t tell me, “You’ll know,” like most other people did when I expressed concern in the possibility of not recognizing the real thing (I didn’t “know” with Ruby and I felt more unsure the second time around, since I knew what real labor felt like and what I was experiencing felt like real labor). So she told me if there was blood I should definitely call. (In retrospect, that would have been a few moments before Claire was born!)
Well, all this worked to our advantage in the end. In many ways, I’m very thankful for the way that my body gets ready for labor. With Claire, it really did make most of my “real” labor seem like a walk in the park. I feel so prepared to take on anything by the time it actually kicks in, and relaxation is second nature by then. But it does take hindsight to appreciate all the pain and frustration! My “easy” and “fast” labor with Claire was not without its price tag. That last month was pretty expensive. :) Had I not experienced all those weeks of strong, long, frequent contractions, I would have immediately recognized the start of Claire’s labor, and may have even been disappointed that for a second birth, it was a whole 12 hours long. As it turned out, I was ecstatic that it was during the day and only one day long. It's helpful to see the positive side: that God is good to have given me experiences that are beyond what I can handle and that stretch me beyond my perceived limits, driving me to Him.
When I started noticing Braxton Hicks contractions in my second pregnancy, (Claire—noticeable at 14 weeks, Jan. 2006) I realized my B. H. contractions must be very different from “normal,” because they feel like beginning/mid-labor contractions in their duration and intensity, as well as their frequency (especially during the last trimester). {Bonus note: At this writing, I am pregnant with my 3rd child and started noticing B.H. at 6 weeks that I could validate when I pushed on my rock-hard racquetball-sized uterus. By 9 weeks I had already experienced them every 10 minutes for several hours at a time; strong enough to keep me awake at night. Most days, at 18 weeks along now, at least 2 dozen contractions a day catch my attention, about 1/4 of which I would consider strong (i.e. I wait at least till after the peak of the contraction before comencing my activity).}
During my Braxton Hicks contractions, my entire uterus would get hard as a rock, feeling like it was about to burst, with an intense downward and forward pull and (especially toward the later weeks with Ruby & Claire, but already happening at 12 weeks w/the 3rd) much pelvic pain/pressure. Many of them were intense enough to have a nauseating effect, causing the back of my mouth to produce extra saliva and make me close to vomiting, which went along well with feeling "fluish" in the intestinal area. Pushing on my uterus during these contractions is painful, as it feels like it is bruised from overuse. Even having my belly touched is not preferable during most of my B.H. If sitting, I usually had to lean back (to give my belly room to move forward without any interference from my legs) as well as move or hold out my waistband on my pants to keep it from “digging in” during the contraction. In the last trimester, after experiencing frequent contractions for hours at a time, I often had to close my eyes, breathe deeply and relax all the muscles in my body in order to not worsen my discomfort and be driven crazy by these “go-nowhere” contractions. It was especially important to make a point of breathing abdominally to lessen the pain, because my initial reaction was to chest-breathe in order to keep the tummy part of me from expanding even more than it felt like it already was.
After months of long, strong, close together contractions (in the last few weeks for an average of 5-6 hours at a time, and sometimes all day and into the night), true labor was difficult to discern. I thought it would be easier to know for sure with my second child, since I now know what labor feels like and how bad it gets, but it was actually more confusing than when I was pregnant with Ruby (my first). With her, I didn’t know that my B. H. were unusually strong because I hadn’t ever had a baby before, so I didn’t know enough to wonder if labor was starting because I was having frequent and strong contractions. (I just thought that’s how B. H. were, and that I must be a wimp to be so annoyed by them.) Something should have clued me in that my contractions were not usual when my childbirth teacher described Braxton Hicks this way: “They don’t hurt, and they’re only like, 10 seconds long.” So only after I had been through labor and was again experiencing B.H. did it finally dawn on me why Ruby’s labor had been so confusing to me.
I decided to count some of my contractions and keep record of their timing in my pregnancy w/Claire. One reason was because I wondered why it was so easy for women to say “My labor started ________.” Why couldn’t I put a time on the start of my labor with Ruby? Was I crazy? And when I would tell people a little about my labor with Ruby, and that I didn’t know for sure if I was in labor until I was dilated to a six, I’d get some pretty weird looks; some assumed my labor must’ve been very mild for me not to know “this is it.”
Now, I have heard stories of women who didn’t know they were in labor because they didn’t feel anything until crowning, etc., but this does not even remotely resemble my experience! The reason that I did not recognize labor was due to the fact that I feel too much going on—and it is hard to discern whatever differences there may be between labor and prelabor for me—not because I wasn’t feeling pain or discomfort: I had been feeling labor-like contractions for months. This is why the description “Frog-In-The-Pot-Of-Water” is perfect for my labor experiences so far (and hence, why the blog has its name).
For the first few hours of my labor w/Ruby (my first), I wondered to myself, “Why am I timing Braxton Hicks just because I’ve had a bloody show?” My labor with her followed a shorter—but much more intense—prodromal pattern than Claire’s; putzing along from Sunday morning to evening, kicking into high gear all night long, then petering out to pretty normal (for me) B.H. on Monday, intensifying again the next night and continuing very hard until I had her Tuesday morning. But I wasn’t “allowed” to have started labor on Sunday—“women are in labor for hours, not days,” the triage nurse told me—so my chart reports that 1st stage was only 8 hours, 20 minutes. How nice.
So I kept a decent record with Claire’s pregnancy for several reasons: to make sense to myself why I was always wondering “will this turn out to be labor?” when it wouldn’t; to keep me from second guessing my memory when given the questioning looks (“But are they real contractions? How can you not know if you’re in labor? How lucky for it to be that easy for you! Mine was so hard/painful. I’d love to be able to say I didn’t know.”); to challenge people, like the triage nurse—who don’t believe me because my experience doesn’t fit into their box of what is possible in labor—that some women do not have a textbook experience, but the fact that you have never read, heard of or seen it doesn’t negate its validity, and finally to encourage other women who have or will experience something similar that they are not insane or wimps, and that they, too, can make the experience work for them, not against them. (As if the contractions don’t drive you crazy enough—you don’t need doubts that you’re imagining it all to top it off!)
{Just to make sure that we’re on the same page re: contractions, I’ll define what I mean. Duration/length: the time from start to finish of a contraction. Frequency/spacing: the time from the start of one contraction to the start of another (i.e. if a contraction started at 5 p.m. and was 1 min, 30 seconds in duration and at 5:05 p.m. I had another one, the time that I felt no contractions was 3 min, 30 seconds, yet I would say that the contractions are 5 min. apart). This is the standard way of timing contractions, but some women count the spacing from the end of one contraction to the beginning of the next as the frequency. This can make quite a difference when charting frequency if the contractions are of sizable duration, so it is important to define what I have in my mind when using the terms frequency/spacing and the like.}
In my pregnancies so far, my Braxton Hicks build in duration and intensity over the last trimester, becoming extremely strong and uncomfortable the last month. They never get totally regular—one month before Claire’s due date they were 5 to 18 minutes apart and everywhere in between (averaging 10 min. apart) but as regular as they can get (2 to 10 minutes apart—w/an average of 6 min.), they can really throw me off. Contrary to what many books say, a woman can be in active labor and not have a “regular” pattern. Even on Claire’s birthday (“real” labor!), my contractions were from 2 to 11 or more minutes apart within the same few hours.
Contractions also have a pretty long duration in the last few weeks of my pregnancies: I didn’t usually count any that didn’t last more then 30 seconds, and most of the time dismissed any that lasted less than a minute (so when, at 36 weeks, I wrote on my calendar on June 22 that I had counted more than 65 contractions in just short of 18 hours, or, almost 4 an hour—not that it was ever that neat—that’s not counting any short ones). Toward the last 3 weeks before Claire was born, I timed many that were in excess of 2 minutes long, and on several occasions, longer: a 6+ and 9+ minute contraction (around 8:45 p.m. and 2:30 a.m., respectively, July 3); one on my list lasted 3 min. 30 seconds and double peaked (10:07 a.m., July 5); I had 4 contractions on my chart July 9 that were between 3 min and 3 min, 15 sec. long, and a 5+ min. contraction (2:20 a.m.); I had a 4 min, 30 sec. contraction (10:15 p.m., July 10); and on the 13th—day before Claire was born—a 7 min, 40 sec. double peaking one at 7:41 a.m. (Too much detail, you say? But I did go to the trouble of keeping a careful record. I had to make it worth my while and put it in here somewhere!)
For the last month of my pregnancy w/Claire, I mostly counted my contractions on days when they seemed to be more frequent or regular. When they were also accompanied by pain associated w/labor and/or prelabor symptoms, I would also time them. The first day I did this was June 25th (36 weeks prego). I had extreme and constant pain in my lower back, as well as round ligament pain shooting into my legs, both of which did not let up between contractions (the pain, not my legs!). I was in agony, but the contractions themselves were uncomfortably strong and annoying, not what I would consider very painful. Nevertheless, I was in such pain overall, I thought this could be the day. (How many women start their labors with extremely painful contractions anyway? In most labors, it takes time to get to the “Wow, these are too painful!” stage, right?)
I started timing them in late morning, after seeing off my out-of-town company. I timed 47 contractions from 11:16 a.m. to 11:25 p.m., (averaging out to about 4 an hour, but I didn’t count or time all day—took a nap, took a break from timing for a few hours, etc.). Contractions came every 5 to 18 minutes (though most fell into a 5-12 minute window), were strong in intensity, and were anywhere from 30 seconds to 2 minutes, 10 seconds long. (When I timed—not counted—them, I did include the shorter ones in order to chart the frequency. But the average duration of contractions that day was 1 min, 15 seconds, which is funny, since some textbook “real” labors don’t ever get contractions longer than that, and if they do, that duration is not an average for the whole labor, but maybe an exception—say, during transition.) But, no baby came of all that contracting. I just quit timing and went to bed.
One other thing I noticed about my B.H. contractions that seem different from what I’ve read and what other women describe is that mine don’t seem to care much what I’m doing (including the textbook solution to lots of B.H.—drink water and empty your bladder often). Some of my friends have said that theirs will subside if they drink some water or change their activity level. I charted myself eating, drinking, bathing, walking, resting, etc. and they didn’t stop or even change much. Sometimes things like taking a bath or shower would even make them closer together—usually a sign that it is “real” labor. Another way they’re not like the textbook definition is that they are more—not less—noticeable during exercise; again, a sign of real labor.
Something that did help me through the last month (because I hide when I’m in pain if I don’t know someone extremely well) was spending time with people. Casey encouraged me to do this to keep my mind off the contractions and preserve my sanity. I met friends for lunch, took my Gram to her Dr. appointments, had company for dinner, etc. It was refreshing to think of something else besides, “Why is this happening . . . and why is it not happening at the same time?!” I was able to keep my mind otherwise engaged, all the while noticing most of the contractions I was having. They were strong enough to not be able to ignore, but I was agreeably occupied enough not to be frustrated by their presence.
Before switching to a home-birth midwife with Claire (another story for another time), I mentioned to my OB early on in the pregnancy that I had strong, frequent B.H. He said to tell him if they ever got to 4 an hour or more, because there would be a concern of pre-term labor. I just smiled. Later, I decided that I wouldn’t tell him, because this is exactly what happened w/Ruby, too, and I went full-term w/her (3 days early). I figured it would just cause unnecessary stress to me and the baby for them to do tests or “watch” me, or put me on drugs. I wonder how often that happens that something is falsely labeled as preterm labor, when time would show that it is just a cantankerous uterus? (It is probably too much of a risk—good thing I didn’t know better with Ruby. :) On April 24, 2006—when I was 28 weeks along—about the time I switched to a home birth midwife—I had 25+ contractions in about 2 hours (an average of less than 5 minutes apart). And yet they petered out and there was no delivery of a pre-term baby.
Perhaps I should take comfort in the fact that my B.H. contractions oftentimes fit the textbook description of active labor contractions. I suppose it should encourage me that it’s not all in my head. But if it’s not “labor” and it’s not “not” labor, then what is it?
On several occasions during the lovely month of “non-labor” with Claire, I would get back on the internet, type in “false labor” again and read what different medical/pregnancy/baby websites would say about it (had I missed something crucial?). It was so frustrating to run down the list of “if it’s really labor . . . ,” and say, “yes, they are strong, yes, they are regular (again, as regular as mine get—even in “real” labor), yes, they are close together, no, they don’t stop or change with differing behavior, yes, they are building in intensity” (though that is a subjective question—never knew quite how to answer that one—maybe I was just getting annoyed with them after so many hours.) “Yes, yes, yes.” Until I got to the cervical dilation part, which I didn’t know because I hadn’t been checked (and didn’t want to be checked: why bother with something that is either going to give me false hope that I’m going to have this baby any minute or disappoint me that I’m going through all this pain for nothing? So what if I am 70% effaced, dilated to a 4 and baby’s at zero station? I could go like that for weeks, as women have before me. And what if I’m an absolute zero and the baby hasn’t dropped? I could have the baby tomorrow, as women have before me. Numbers don’t necessarily mean labor is or is not happening!) And the last on the “real labor” list that would seal the deal: “It ends in a baby being born.” So I’d get off the computer, dejectedly figuring that the only way I’d know if it really was labor is when I actually had Claire and, in retrospect, could say, “So it was labor that time!” And what do you know? It happened almost exactly as I predicted (although I did realize it was the real thing almost 2 hours before she was born, so I got to have the excitement phase at least!).
On one of my last visits to my midwife before Claire was born, I told Barb I didn’t know at what point I should call her. She told me to call when contractions were 5 min. apart, lasting one minute for an hour. I said that I would have already called at least 5 times by now by that standard. She said, “Oh, you’re one of THOSE.” It was so different and very reassuring that she recognized that it was possible to experience what was happening to me. And she didn’t tell me, “You’ll know,” like most other people did when I expressed concern in the possibility of not recognizing the real thing (I didn’t “know” with Ruby and I felt more unsure the second time around, since I knew what real labor felt like and what I was experiencing felt like real labor). So she told me if there was blood I should definitely call. (In retrospect, that would have been a few moments before Claire was born!)
Well, all this worked to our advantage in the end. In many ways, I’m very thankful for the way that my body gets ready for labor. With Claire, it really did make most of my “real” labor seem like a walk in the park. I feel so prepared to take on anything by the time it actually kicks in, and relaxation is second nature by then. But it does take hindsight to appreciate all the pain and frustration! My “easy” and “fast” labor with Claire was not without its price tag. That last month was pretty expensive. :) Had I not experienced all those weeks of strong, long, frequent contractions, I would have immediately recognized the start of Claire’s labor, and may have even been disappointed that for a second birth, it was a whole 12 hours long. As it turned out, I was ecstatic that it was during the day and only one day long. It's helpful to see the positive side: that God is good to have given me experiences that are beyond what I can handle and that stretch me beyond my perceived limits, driving me to Him.
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