More on Birthing Sounds

Some comments to one of my recent posts made this link seem just the thing for diferentiating helpful v. not helpful birthing sounds.  (This link comes compliments of a fellow Bradley instructor on the teacher forums. . . which, by the way, have been a-buzzin' lately. . . I hope to be free to write about this soon!)

If I Were Truly "On" Face Book, I'd "Like" This

Sarah, from here, said this:

Many people are vaguely aware that "too many cesareans are being done," but they are unaware of the cause-and-effect that lead to preventable cesareans and other interventions. I know this because almost every woman who has had a cesarean, thinks that *her* cesarean was necessary/life-saving/not preventable. Statistically, over half a million preventable cesareans are performed annually in the US, so SOMEBODY'S cesarean was preventable.

(Contented sigh as I revel in reading the thoughts of others that validate my own.  Someone else said it.  I can't be that crazy. :)

The Price of Natural Childbirth

This post is for CM, MB and CC; friends who have recently given birth naturally.  They made it look easy.  But it wasn’t.  It just appeared that way.  If you can relate, this post is for you, too.

Lately, I’ve been directed to some YouTube birth videos.  The kind where the woman is screaming or, at the very least, protesting each contraction.  She’s in pain.  It’s more than obvious.  The comments that follow the video are sympathetic.  The woman is commended for having gone through the horrific experience.
One of my fellow teacher’s comments (about one of these videos) on our teacher forums got me thinking.  She’d posted the link along with the phrase: “NOT a Bradley mom!”  After watching only seconds of the video of this woman in early labor, I smiled at the validation that for once, someone else had the same perspective.

What’s your perspective?  Let me give you two examples.

Example one:  A contraction hits Mom; she writhes in pain.  Her face contorts.  Her hands grasp the bed sheets.  She screams.  She thrashes.  It is clear to any observer: she’s in agony.

Example two: Mom has a contraction.  She breathes deeply; sighs.  Her sounds are low.  She sways.  Her face is relaxed and peaceful.  It isn’t apparent that she’s experiencing difficulty.  An onlooker may not even notice she’s contracting.

What is your first thought? (Believe it or not, your answer to this reveals a lot about your preconceptions about labor and birth.)

If you said that the second woman had a higher pain tolerance or an easy labor, you have the perspective of the majority of Americans.

If you said the first woman is having a harder labor, if you said she was experiencing more pain, you may be right.  But not the way you might think.

I’ll give you my perspective: Mom #1 does not know (or is not proficient) in pain-reducing techniques.  She is not aware that her pain is exacerbated by her behavior.  She does not realize that position, tension, perceptions and expression can lend to more pain than she may otherwise have.  She is experiencing unnecessary pain.

Mom #2 is well-versed in comfort measures for labor.  She knows that doing all she can to get out of the way and allow her body to work unhindered will reduce her pain and finish the work ahead of her.  She works with the pain she does experience, and she sees it as good: the baby is coming.  Though her appearance is that of rest and tranquility, she is working.  Hard.  To relax.

This is how I see it.  This is how my fellow teacher saw it.

This is not how the general public sees it.

A woman who wants to give birth naturally might want to consider what it will cost her.  In order to assure the most success in her endeavor—indeed, the most enjoyment—she will need to give up her right to have a dramatic labor.  The better a woman stays relaxed and tension-free, the more it will look like she’s not even in labor (that is, from the perspective of the untrained eye).

Unknowing friends and acquaintances will not recognize all the work that went into the birth.  After the fact, whether her labor was long or short, word may get around that she just “showed up and had a baby.” Her providers may also be under this impression.  Even her husband may not realize how hard she was working.
It may be assumed that she is just “tough.”  Or worse, that she had it easy.  After  all, she wasn’t complaining.  And she didn’t look that uncomfortable.  It must have been easy for her.  She must be one of the lucky ones.

The woman who gives birth under the honed skills of relaxation may be despised by onlookers, hearers and naysayers.  She may reap the spite of other women; women will tell her they “hate her” for having an easy time of it.

Yes, natural, enjoyable birth has its asking price.  A price that is worth the time and effort necessary (necessary for all but the smallest percentage of women), but a price, none-the-less.  A woman would do well to consider and accept this likelihood when she starts on the path toward. . .

Enjoying birth.

Most woman can.  Few desire it.  Fewer succeed.

To my friends and loved ones who worked hard to prepare and educate yourselves for safe and satisfying births, I believe you.  I believe it was hard work.  I believe it wasn’t easy.  Congratulations on making it look so easy that people assume it was.

10/12/10 Edited to add this awesome link on birth sounds.

When Labor Becomes Birth, I’ll Alter My Plans

 Though I have not been keeping an official record, prodromal labor continues.  Over the past couple weeks, contractions are generally 10 or less minutes apart and about a minute long (some more, some less—again, not keeping an official record) about 3-5 days of the week.  On the other days, ctx are more spaced out and may not be as strong.  As a general rule, they’re about a minute long no matter what.
From Monday to Wednesday of last week, ctx were 10 min or less apart, day and night.  Then I had a great break for Thursday (when I had arranged w/a friend to clean house).  Ctx were present, but not as close or strong.  I had another day or two of “the usual” ctx pattern after that.
This past Monday, ctx were spaced 10 minutes all day until around 7:30 p.m. to 1 a.m., where they were 2 minutes apart (1 min long).  The next morning, they had tapered down in intensity and spacing.
Then, yesterday morning around 4 a.m., I began having ctx 2 minutes apart, one min. long, and very crampy.  (Crampy ctx are not usual for me in this pregnancy like they were last time.)  I was dreaming I was in labor and kept wondering why the contraction never ended.  When I came out of the haze of half-sleep, I realized it was because there was only about a minute break between ctx.  It just seemed like one ongoing contraction from my sleepy perspective.
Casey’s alarm went off a little after 5 a.m. and I told him what was going on.  We decided he would stay home in case it turned into anything.  At his prodding, I put my laptop down (was checking e-mail for 1/2 hour) and we took a nap after he read me a Psalm and prayed with me.  Contractions continued 2 min apart and a minute long, and very strongly crampy.  Baby was moving around a lot, too.  Even so, we got some good rest until the girls awoke.  Case went downstairs with them to give me a little more time to rest (because of heartburn the night before, I’d had about a 3-hour window of sleep before contractions awoke me in the morning).
Some time in that nap, the contractions really tapered off in intensity.  By 9 a.m., they were back to my usual contractions—not as crampy.  By 10, they were also not as close together.  So Case headed off to work around 10:30, as my friends arrived to take the girls for a few hours (we’d arranged this last week) so I could get some organizing done around the house.  In comparison to the early-morning contractions, I hardly noticed the ones I had the rest of the day.  This is the pot-of-water in full effect.  These contractions weren’t weak, they just weren’t as demanding as the others had been.
Late that afternoon, my midwives arrived for the home visit.  They re-checked my blood, as last week, we discovered that I was anemic (crit level of 32.  Twenty-five is when a transfusion is called for).  No wonder I’ve been so tired!  Since Saturday, when MW 2 called me, I’ve been taking 150 mg of iron 3x a day along with 500 mg vitamin C.  I also upped the red raspberry leaf ratio in my pregnancy tea (doubled it) to help strengthen my uterus.  I’m also taking black-strap molasses (ick) and chloroxygen (for better iron absorbtion).  The only difficulty that has come of this is that it is best for me to take the iron on an empty stomach, but I can’t do an empty stomach for very long before getting nauseated, so I’ll try to wait an hour before eating or taking Tums (which is the only way I can keep from throwing up from the heartburn I get at night).  We’ll know in a couple days what my iron levels are, and then we’ll discuss if it would be wise to give me a shot of Pitocin immediately after delivery.
Around 3 a.m. this morning, contractions again presented strong enough that I had to sleep between them.  Crampiness wasn’t immediate, but rather built up.  Something I noticed with the few contractions I actually timed is that only about half of the contraction is crampy (maybe till the peak—about 1 minute), and the rest is just the usual rock-hard belly contracting.  So, they’re longer (2 min long) but only half is really strong.  And this morning, ctx are between 4 and 7 min. apart, so they don’t seem as bad because of the break in between.
True to the frog-in-the-pot-of-water perspective, this time, I told Case to go ahead into work—I’d call if things picked up or changed.  I am also planning to continue with today’s commitments: a friend from church is having the girls and I as well as another woman and her children over for lunch.  They live about 1/2 hour away.  I figure if I get too uncomfortable, we’ll head home, and if things get really crazy, I’ll call Case and ask him and the midwives to meet us there.  I’m not going to cancel my plans every day for the next week or more until contractions turn into birth.  It truly messes with the mind to sit around waiting to see if contractions will continue/intensify/close in.  Not going to do it.

*Update: the next day, I posted this on my other blog.

Officially Affiliated

After nearly two months since I sent in my final examination, I heard from AAHCC that I passed and am now a fully affiliated instructor for the Bradley Method of Natural Childbirth (R).  I heard from one of my fellow instructors that she’d also just been told she passed, and she had to wait three months!  Crazy.

We’re waiting to see what life is like with a fourth child before committing to teaching the next series, but the plan is to not teach another one until at least September and possibly January of 2011.  Even so, it is a huge relief to know we’ve gotten this far, and the timing could not be better.  I’m so glad Casey encouraged me to get certified when he did.  Otherwise, we’d have found many reasons not to do it, and I’m pretty sure I would not have attempted to go through the year-long process with four little ones.  So glad that part’s over.  Mosey on over to the Academy’s horrendously outdated website for a peek at our “official” web page (ugh).

Bradley Final: One Step Closer to the End!

This afternoon, the girls and I made our once-every-few-months pilgrimage to the post office, where (among other things) I sent my final exam off to CA for the powers that be to grade. Finished all 21 pages of it this morning at 2:30 a.m. and mailed it off as soon as we could get out the door today (2 hours to do so--why we only make it to the P.O. every few months--so many things to mail, and none of them ready).

Bradley gives a month to complete the exam, and today marks exactly one month since they sent it to me. I probably could have waited a few more days, but I wanted this thing DONE. Every evening that I haven't worked on it has been not-as-enjoyable because I am putting it off.

For the first few weeks I had it, I barely did anything with it. I seriously found it intimidating. Nine sections, seven of which have 10 or more essay questions each, the eighth section being 88 vocabulary words needing definitions (I've always been bad at defining words). The final section was possibly the easiest. A few weeks ago, I sat down to do the first few essay questions and got really bogged down. It was another week or more before I picked it up again. Those first four sections probably took me 1 1/2 to 2 hours each to complete. As I got more into it, it went faster, and last night, I believe I completed the last 3 sections, plus did proof-reading and formatting for the whole thing in about 5 hours (had to wait till class was over, so it extended into the morning).
Total time put in is probably 15 to 20 hours. One thing that helped immensely is that I called to clarify a few things and found out something that really took the pressure off. See, the beginning of the exam has a part where you have to sign and say on the honor system that you had no help from anything (book, person, whatever) in completing the exam. I found this confusing, because in the couple times that I had taken up the exam to complete another portion, I found that I could answer some of the previous questions I had already answered, either better or with more clarification. I knew this had to be because of something I'd read in the teacher's manual, student workbook or another book I'd read since I'd last picked up the exam, so I wasn't sure how I should answer these questions, because at some point, I had learned MOST of the stuff I was answering FROM A BOOK! (Yes, I am a very literal person, if you do not already know.)

So I wondered how they could both allow me a whole month to complete the exam (assuming that I am working on it little by little) yet not have any "help" from learning or being reminded of anything in that time. Let me be clear: I did not think that I was allowed to sit down with the exam and have a book with me to reference as I answered questions, or google something whilst I typed away in Word, but it seemed hazy as to what I wasn't allowed to do. I knew it needed to be my answers, but many of my answers are not truly "mine" because I've reviewed the material so much by now. My impression from some of the message boards I'd read is that most people went through and answered all the questions they could answer easily and then came back to the harder stuff later. I assumed this was because they needed to do a little more research on those topics, etc. It sounded like a reasonable plan to me, until I experienced what it meant to come back to the questions after some time away. It quickly overwhelmed me.

Since every time I came back to the exam, I felt like I had a better understanding of many questions I had previously answered (and that without purposely going to do research on those questions), I began to feel VERY overwhelmed with how thorough and detailed I could be with this exam.

Last week, I ran into a question on which I needed clarification: wasn't too sure what they were asking. So I called and while I was asking, I clarified what exactly the honor system required. She explained that I was not allowed to go look something up specifically, even if I knew where to find the answer. However, she said they could not stop me from teaching my series while I completed the exam, and if I came across things in preparing for classes, I was welcome to use the information I'd read. Is it me, or is that a little confusing? I would never have assumed such a thing. Seems like splitting hairs to me. It did help clarify my predicament: the things that I'd had a hazy answer for almost jumped out at me when I would prepare for classes. Not that I'd gone and researched something specifically, but in my "research" (yes, I do that for every class I teach) of what I was to teach that week, I found a great deal of info. that I would not have paid as much attention to if I had not remembered a question on the exam to which it spoke. And it just kinda felt like cheating.

But anyway, I was very comforted to know that they did not necessarily expect me to have a thorough or detailed answer for every question. They wanted me to answer from what is in my head, without ruling out that new things can come in there if I am currently teaching/learning more about birth (yet not because I'm studying for the exam--it really gets into motives, doesn't it? Eesh. Too hazy for me.). This greatly helped my anxiety about answering questions: I was expected to answer them to the best of my ability NOW. I was not expected to kill myself "finding" the answers, nor to limit my answers if I HAD learned more (inadvertently, that is, and that is KEY to taking the pressure off). When I hung up, I tried to wrap my mind around what the honor system required of me. I decided to treat the exam like a student that I would only have for one week, and would never have contact with again: they only get what I know off the top of my head. I do not have the luxury of saying, "Let me look into that and get back with you." (Thank God--I cannot imagine how many pages the exam would've ended up being if I were allowed/expected to do that.)

As it turned out, I think I may have come back and answered ten or less questions with more clarification or detail than I had before (usually after preparing for or teaching another class!). And here I had wanted to put off finishing the exam because I wanted to "learn" all I could before I answered all those questions. Who knew I was allowed to learn along the way?

Glad it's done. What a relief. And last night marked the half-way point in our current series. It's going well. Have 2 great students. We had one other student, but it just wasn't working for her to come to class, as her husband was not able to attend with her, and often needed her to help him with his commitments on class night. I'm bummed we couldn't have found a night that worked well for all four of us. It would have been great to have them in class, too.

Both students from last series have now given birth, and both without medication (and from what they've expressed to me, happily so!). I'm glad they're pleased, and proud of them for preparing for an unmedicated birth. Doing so is no small task.

God willing, in another 6 weeks I will have completed all the requirements to wrap up my provisional affiliation w/Bradley. I'm so excited to have come this far! God has been so faithful to bring us to this point.

I Promised You Crazy

Here is a little about what's been going on pregnancy-wise around here.